I am fairly new to sex. My partner and I have had sex three times thus far, and it is fine as long as he is on top. I have several questions concerning condoms, and also about making sex last longer.
I was wondering if anyone could suggest a type of condom that feels better for men. He is quite big, and he says that the condom reduces the pleasure and is uncomfortable. Any ideas?
His method is basically "Get off quick, sex multiple times a night." My words, not his. I have tried to make sex more sensual, going slower, but once he starts going, he goes fast and hard. How can I make it last longer?
Last but not least, occasionally I like to hop on top. However, I don't feel like I can get the movement right, and sometimes he falls out, etc. He says it is not very pleasurable to him, and again, blames the condom. I have tried the Kegel exercises, but ultimately, he just got himself off while I sucked and shallowed. (Not complaining) but I with I could pleasure him more.
Issues, issues, thanks for reading. :D
You are fairly new to sex and already getting the oldest con job that men dish out, "Screwing with a condom is like washing your feet with your socks on!" Every woman around has had partners who complained forever about how condoms spoil sex for them. The next time I deliver a baby from a man, I will begin to listen.
He is the man; let him get find one that he likes. He can order samplers on line and try several different ones - both size and brand.
The rest of your post has to do with technique. He is a terrible lover. Get a copy of the Joy of Sex and the two of you go through it together. If he does not want to learn, you do not want him. You see, the second biggest con men pull on us women is that, "I am the greatest lover; the problems are caused by you." We women buy into this by trying to find ways to please HIM at our expense. Our sexual response is much more tentative and fragile than theirs.
Can I suggest you shop around a bit?
oh god, please don't tell him to his face that he is cumming too quick, it will kill his ego, it is about as bad as saying that you can't feel it because it is so small,..... or maybe that is just may low self esteem. I am sorry that i can't tell you a good way to let him know, but there are certain condoms called "climax control" I know that atleast durex and trojan make a type like that.
and you can just tell him that he should slow down to make it more sexy, and hope that he respects you enough to do so
Brandye: Thanks for your help. I will look into that book (I have heard of it before...) But I don't think he will want to read it. I have been trying to see if sex with him gets easier with time, since I am new to it, but I think the last time his aim was a little off... Thanks for your help.
Ryouko: Thanks for the tips, I will try them out. ;)
And I guess shattering his very existance my informing him of his quick yet lackluster preformace would be kind of harsh. No worries. Thanks. =]