Orgasmic Birth

[Ducy]

The three girls are all between 4'11 and 5'1 and incredibly petite.

[big916]

thats almost a child size person. you have to ride in a booster seat in a car if you aren't over 4'9"

[RedRoses]

That is feet and inches, isn't it? (sorry I need to translate) If so that indeed is rather small!

It's not to say it's not true it's CPD. It is to say that some women that were told to have it at a prior birth, get xrays to get properly diagnosed and do get to have a vaginal birth with their next child. More than once this is a blessing; as many women feel that they've "missed" something and long to have a normal birth the next time. I don't know about your friends, but if they would desire to give birth vaginally the next time, it would be advisable to have it properly checked and diagnosed (if not done yet, off course). All I'm saying is: there could be hope where there was thought to be none

[Ducy]

Oh yes I know that doctors tend to diagnose something too soon. I know some girls who are short but incredibly curvy and have no problems giving birth. But 1 of them was insanely petite. Like she wasn't annorexic or anything, but we hooked up and even though "fun sized" girls are a turn on, I just couldn't bring myself to "let myself go".

[J<3A]

When my wife gave birth a while ago to our twins, she said, yes, it did hurt, but it was a fairly mixed-emotion experience...

[Nom Noms]

I am pregnant with my second child. My doctor is allowing me to have a vaginal delivery, however, I will be indused and monitored very closely. My last pregnancy I had an emergency c-section and lost my baby, and nearly died myself. Everyone that I talk to about what a vaginal birth is like tells me that it is excrutiatingly painful, especially if you do not get the epidural. My mother-in-law actually told me that not being able or not having a vaginal delivery makes you less of a woman because realy women have their babies naturally. What would you say to that? I have so many fears because of what happened during my last pregnancy that I am not sure an orgasmic birth would every be possible for me.

[RedRoses]

Horrible to lose a child. I'm so sorry for you, dear Nom Noms. And your fears about this birth are of course completely understandable.

Not being able to give birth vaginally does NOT make you less a woman. Please, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Every mother tries to deliver her baby into this world the best way she can. If complications arise, then it's a blessing medical assistance and interference exist. Even when it sadly can't save the lives of everyone. Birth is a highly emotional experience. And all the different emotions that women go through during and after giving birth are all to be accepted. You shouldn't be made to feel a certain way by someone else.

On to the happy news: congratulations on your pregnancy! Yes, there are women who have orgasms during birth. But the term orgasmic is much more than the narrow definition often used. It is "Intense or unrestrained excitement or a similar point of intensity or emotional excitement", as quoted on the website Orgasmic Birth. In it's essence, this documentary and book are set on creating a positive and satisfying birth experience for every mother.

Pain is very individual and the way a birth is experienced is too. Yes, birth is often described as (very) painful. Some women describe it as the most painful experience in their lives. Though also realize there is a difference between each stage and how the mothers feel about what they're going through. The stage you're pushing your baby out, to many women is considered an incredible relieve compared to the contractions they've gone through prior. It's also often noted that it is a different kind of pain, since it isn't inflicted, but part of a natural process in which you're flooded with hormones to cope. A comforting thought may also be to realize that so many women have done this and so many consciously chose to go through birth multiple times.

Also; there is a difference between pain and suffering. You can have pain, but feel strong and good about yourself at the same time. You can feel trust in your body and your baby, even if you need precautions or possibly interventions. Also know that you are capable of transform what you're feeling with coping strategies. For example: Noali Vinaver in the short documentary "Birth Day" describes that as long as she kept looking in the eyes of her husband, she felt love swollen "as if the sun wanted to burst out of my belly" and not pain. This is not just a spiritual believe. Science has shown that people are incapable of feeling pleasure and pain at the same time, because it is registered in the same part of the brain. This may be an encouraging thought, helping you believe in your inner strength.

If I may advice you; it is important to create a birthing environment where you can feel safe and relaxed, supported and respected. Ask your doctor for your possibilities and hospital policies in advance. Think about things such as: Dimming the lights. Put up little christmas-lights or use electric candles. Bring you own music. Move around, even with portable fetal monitoring (ask if this is available). Use a birthball (some hospitals have them or bring one yourself). Bring the people you love with you. Bring your doula. I think a doula may be very beneficial to you.

A doula is a trained woman to provide you continuous emotional and physical support (massage/relaxation techniques and positioning) during your birth. She will never leave your side and is there to protect your positive birth experience and encourage your autonomy. During your pregnancy she will help you prepare. She's knowledgeable and is able to provide you with information and the (local) resources you need. You can read all about it and find a certified doula in your area via DONA International.

I hope this was helpful. Feel free to ask questions. Either at the forum or via PM. I am a doula-to-be myself. Of course I can never be a substitute for a doula close to you. But I just like to let you know that if I can be of assistance to you in any way, I'd be happy to

My best wishes to you!