Sex After Having A Baby

[Athletic Male]

Can someone please help me. My wife and I have just had our first child. The child is now 5 months old and our sexlife has gone way down hill. Sex for her is painful now due to the fact that she tore pretty badly giving birth. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to make it better for her

[Newtolove]

erm perhaps you should see a doctor ?

[LePuceau]

I heard that a woman should wait about 8 months or so after giving birth before getting theurge to sex. At least, that's what I heard and it may not be precise. You should wait a couple of months, to let her body heal itself due to the problems she had while giving birth. I would probably bet that in less than 1 year, she'll find that urge. And as Newtolove said, you should go see a doctor and ask his professionnal opinion.

LePuceau (French for "The Virgin Guy")

[Athletic Male]

4 months is the standard and she wants to now it just feels painful for her at first

[Brandye]

I do not know where those numbers come from. Some women are anxious to resume at their six week check; others take a long time. Nine months of pregnancy takes its toll. Every woman experiences some anxiety the first time - no matter how many children she has had. If it hurts, that increases the anxiety next time and on and on.

The concern is the pain she is experiencing. The doctor who delivered and knows the details of the tear should examine her closely and should be able to do any repair that is necessary or make appropriate referral. Even without tearing, some few women have issues with the episiotomy. She should definitely check with her ob/gyn.

[EvilEvilKitten]

In addition to that issue, there's the 'not sleeping' issue and the 'beng toally responsible for another' issue. She might simply be too TIRED or too OVERWHELMED to be ready for sex at this time. Try giving the lady a break.

[Gypsy]

I tore COMPLETELY during childbirth, and if I recall correctly it was a good 8 months or more before I would even consider it. A few more after that to actually get beck into the swing of things.

[Ducy]

I love how all the guys were saying exactly how long it takes a WOMAN to get the urge for sex again.

And just listening to some of the posts in this thread, Im very grateful that women are the ones who give birth...in fact. I think once I get married Im going to just start apologizing on my wedding day (if we want to have kids of course)

[Want_to_be _better]

My wife had our second child two years ago and there was extensive tearing. Putting my wife back together as she puts it took longer than giving birth. She wanted sex sooner than she could have it. It still feels a little different for her and she has spoken to her dr. It doesn't hurt anymore. It just feels different. She was really comfortable having sex about 8 months after the birth.

[mommyof2kids_22]

8 months?????????? i was ready to have sex and happy bout it 3 wks after having both my kids who are 10 months apart, because no bc after i had son but yeah we love our kids son = 13 months daughter = 3 months old. u could start out with oral or things u know she likes