I really don't hope I have some sort of a problem. About three weeks ago, I posted the topic that I was still a 17 year old virgin, nervous about sex with my girlfriend, being naked etc. Well, as I said in that topic, after the usual clumsly virginesqe first time, we did it, but I couldnt seem to cum. This was after a bj and a handy, and well, I am getting quite nervous...
I have yet to cum from anything, b.j, handy, or sex. We have had sex two times since. The second time was very smooth, she was on top, and I hit her buttons pretty damn good, but from me, nothing. Don't get me wrong, it has nothing to do with erection troubles or foreplay. I was rock solid the whole time and we spent a good half hour to fourty five minutes on foreplay, but yet, still nothing.
The third time and the last was pretty damn intense. It was completely naked for the first time, and we actually used a vibrating ring with the condom, man, it was awesome. made her feel like she was in heaven, but me...still didn't get me to climax.
When it happened the first time, I attibuted it to nerves and me being my first time, after the second time with no climax I figured we were just getting used to each others bodies, now after the third time, I am worried as hell, I want to be able to bust. Granted, I masterbate every so often, bot not more then most guys. I laid off that for a few days...didn't help. I am not nervous at all anymore so I stopped blaming it on that. I know its a good problem to have, but I want her to feel like she is making me feel as good as I am making her feel, which is the case.
Maybe I can go a little longer then usual? Just have given up before I got to the point? different position possibly? Me on top didn't work so well either. Is there something medically wrong with me? If so, is their anything I can take excluding Viagra? It would be pretty embarassing taking viagra as a 17 year old.
I am helpless over here guys, I could really use some input. These are the best days of my life so far, and I want to enjoy them to the fullest. Thanks in advance.
Viagra is for when you can't get an erection and you are saying you stay hard the whole time...just don't orgasm.
I mean technically you've only had sex 3 times right? and only then were you even able to get fully naked??
I mean you might "think" you are totally comfortable...but 3 times is still really new to sex...and you just now were able to get naked.
I wouldn't stress about it.. that is probably attributing to it also.
It might still be nerves, but more likely it is because you're used to touching yourself...and she hasn't figured out what "does it" for you. :) Also, having sex is a lot different then masturbation (duh) the sensations are different; different speeds, different textures, different situations. If you're used to always masturbating the same way, it makes sense that you can't cum in a different way. Btw, can you still cum from masturbating or no?
Oh and, viagra is for erections not ejaculation...at least from my understanding.
On a closing note...if you're enjoying, and she's enjoying, whats the problem?! Most inexperienced guys have problems with cumming too fast! You should be happy you can please your girl ;)
I thought of something else :)
I know my b/f says he can last a lot longer when I am on top but one position he can't last long in is if she's laying flat on her stomach....legs together. You stradle her thighs and enter her from behind. He says this one feels TOO GOOD!
The above two replies are an accurate representation of what is going on and what to do about it.
Performance Anxiety happens to many guys, young, old, experienced, or not, when in a new relationship. That you have little experience simply exaserbates the condition. The cure quite literally is to stop worrying. (I know, easier said than done, yet this is the fix.) This will happen when you become more comfortable and relaxed with each other and the situation.
As explained, the resulting feel of a vagina is much different than the feel of a hand. Your hand, your unique method of stroking, make masturbating easy. Turn the reins over to someone else and their way of stroking your penis is usually so much different from what you are conditioned to that you will not achieve a climax. So, what is the fix? Please read the following information:
How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?
As explained, Viagra, et al, are for erection problems. Older men and individuals with medical problems can obtain a precription. The medications are not a cure for failing to achieve an orgasm--especially when there is nothing functionally wrong with the "equipment".
As the two of you explore and learn together about each other and you teach each other how to mimic the way you stimulate yourselves, then use the techniques to get each of you to the brink of an orgasm before beginning intercourse, I believe you will then become successful.
Here is a listing of additional topics the two of you might find useful and interesting.
One Stop Shopping--BEGIN HERE--w/a Partial INDEX of Sex Info 101 Sex Ed. Topics
I say it is still nerves if you can ejaculate from masturbation then you have no problems it is really just nervousness, don't focus so much on the sex or the foreplay for sex just enjoy yourselves
u could be just nervous, i couldnt cum for the first 3 months i had sex
thanks everybody for the replies. Hopefully we have it again today and I am going to just relax, and take our time with it. I think you guys are right....its just nerves
Id have to agree with most. With my frist big relationship, i couldnt cum till 3 months in. Hell after having sex for the first time, it took aobut a months worth of learning to relax to cum through intercourse. I was too nervous, tense, worried. If one thing was wrong, i couldnt get off. I would go though 2-4 hours of awesome sex, but still not cum.
Relax a bit. Let her get you crazy excited. Let her tease. And if you have to for the first few times, get yourself off and have her help. Have her lay beside you, with her hand over yours as you masturbate yourself. Every time you do this, let her do more and more work.