Ok, I'm 21 years old, I just started having sex last year, so I'm not that experianced. I have never had a girl try to go down on me until my current/last love, so this is a first for me. The problem is: I never get off. We have sex just fine, I get off, and I can get her off by sex, fingering her, or performing oral, but I only get off with sex.
The first time we tried I lost it, then we have tried again and again, still nothing. Sometimes I'll be laying there, and she will be at a side angle, or she will be between my legs, or I will sit on the end of the bed, but I can't get off. She gets started, and I always end up losing it. One night she tried for like 45 min.! She was doing it, it would go down, she would come up and turn me back on, and try again, but nothing.
It really hurts her when I can get her off 3 ways, but she can't do this, everytime she is in tears and feels horrible that it didn't work, when I can do it to her. It's my first BJ and she has had exp. before doing this, on several occasions and never had a problem before.
My question, is what can we do diffrently or is there a pill or anything I can do to make myself more sensitive? So I will cum faster. A few occasions I'v gotten close, but she gets tired and her jaw really hurts b/c she says I'm really big and she isn't use to that. At least I think it's close, not to sure since it's my first exp with a BJ and never got off. I want to keep trying, but each time I feel like it's not going to work and worry about how she will have her feelings hurt afterwards, and she just wants to stop b/c nothing happens. What should I say? What should we do? Sometimes it's fun to get off without having sex each time but we can't :'( .
It's been my experience that when a guy can't cum from getting a blow job its one of only a handful of reasons:
1) The person giving oral sex is inexperienced
2) The person recieving oral sex has had somone in the past impress upon him that cumming in a woman's mouth is bad, sexist, etc (this can come from friends, former girlfirends who didn't perform oral sex and gave that as a reason). The mind is the key to all sex, so no matter HOW turned on u are, if your mind says "don't cum while she's blowing you" - it ain't gonna happen!
Now, fixing #1 is alot easier than #2. If she's only given oral to men a few times, there's ALOT to learn about it and it's just as much on YOu as it is on her! Here are a few tips!
- Blowjobs, if dont correctly, should not really cause her jaws to get sore. She does not have to have a death grip around your cock. To make it easier, she should not be afraid of getting your cock very wet with her spit and to wrap one or two of her hands aroudn the base of your cock and glide up and down on your cock (not squeezing, but sliding up and down). If she puts her mouth over th eend of your cock, she can just suck on the head of your cock and that is a great way of getting alot of sensation and not alot of work for her. Now, another tip may make u a bit uneasy, but, if she lubs up a finger, and slides it in your ass, trust me..YOU WILL CUM! The male prostate is easy to find, (its alike a walnut sized bump inside your colon). The prostate makes the seminal fluid that mixes with your sperm to make semen! So, if she lubs up her finger, and eases it in and slowly moves it in and out or around, while scking you....you will cum! Another thing to do is to have her slowly going up and down on your cock with just her mouth lightly gripping your penis, then with her 2 free hands, lightly squeezing your nipples...then rubbing your balls,. then back to yoru nipples!
Just a few ideas to help make your oral sex more enjoyable! Hope this helps!
Yeah I try telling her that though, I can get her off fairly easy and a varitey of ways, but I only get off during sex. I think I might have mentioned that, but I don't think she wants to because it has some of her on me and she does want to taste herself! But I'll ask again. I want to try but I don't want her to be in tears. :'(
Hey man don't worry about it. I went through pretty much the same thing with my girlfriend. Taking too long to get me off, her saying i was too big, jaw hurting etc. And its also quite easy for me to get her off, she was even in tears over it once in much the same way. She only got me off about twice i think. Just explain to your girlfriend that its ok that she can't get you off like that, let her know that it's ok and that you're not disappointed. Also, if you want to try and boost her slef esteem a little(talk about this first with her, make sure its ok) then start by having sex, and when you feel like your getting close to cumming, pull out of her and let her finish you off with a blowjob. If you two don't want to try this though, just assure her that it's ok and that you're not disappointed, communication is key.
I never had a BJ..or anything like that...but I can say...you can try new things to get hornyer more..so you stay hard longer....I think thats what you mean? you get soft fast?...