So me and my girlfriend had sex (first time for her pretty much, as shes had one guy before me but they only had sex for ~30 seconds before she made him stop). It's been a little over a week, and she's due to start her period NEXT wednesday, and she takes birth control. I've also had sex only once and I used a condom, and I used a condom this time.
But the problem is, I've tried fingering her, and ever since we've had sex every time I pull my finger up there's blood. There's not always a lot, but it's definately there. I'm not huge (7 inches) and she is a small girl. I'm guessing 5'4 at the max. I'm wondering what could be causing this problem? I've tried laying off for a few days, and if I insert a finger into her vagina and theres blood I don't continue on the inside. I'll usually rub her clit and make her orgasm that way. She says she doesn't bleed like she's on her period, aka I'm guessing it doesnt get on her clothes/etc, just when I put a finger inside of her. Thanks in advance for your help.
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> my girlfriend had sex (first time for her pretty much, as shes had one guy before me but they only had sex for ~30 seconds before she made him stop.
> I've tried fingering her, and ever since we've had sex every time I pull my finger up there's blood.
Without a physical exam that she should have had before becoming sexually active (and now as soon as practical) just to make certain there are no problems and to have a chance to ask her doctor questions, no one can be certain what the problem is. That said, more than likely her hymen has been torn and has not had sufficient time to mend; therefore, each time it is rubbed the wound is reopened somewhat and bleeds a little bit.
Another possibility is that you have long fingernails and your finger is scratching the inside of her vagina. If true, clip your nail/s and smooth any rough edges.
She's 16, and I'm 17. Her mom will allow her to be on birth control, but would definately go off the deep end on her (aka probably kick her out of the house) if she were to even suggest that we've been sexually active. She already has a tight lock on her, seeing as the fact that I'm not allowed to drive her to the movies when it's just us, and we're pretty much not ever allowed to be without being around her parents or mine.
But thank you for your quick response. Like I said she doesn't feel sore she says. If indeed it is that her hymen was torn and hasnt had time to recover, how long should I wait before I was to try again? Just wait until she's off her period after it starts next wednesday?
Well, to get around the parent issue, there are certain clinics that offer services to young women that are completely confidential (for example, in my area we have Options Clinic and Planned Parenthood, etc etc). She could go to one of these clinics and ask them if they can do an exam (oftentimes there will be either a form you have to fill out about your income and stuff, and a small, but affordable, fee may be charged).
And I'm not an authority on this or anything, but I'd think that it would be kinda hard to tell how long to wait, since everyone heals at a difference pace than other people. I'd say give it two weeks minimum maybe?
Okay first of all she needs to get to her ob/gyn and get checked out.
Blood = not good.
Her Mom won't let her be sexually active and yet let's her be on BCPs. Ooookay! Do we have issues about sex perhaps? What exactly are they thinking here? They are trying to protect her from getting pregnant/diseased? BCPs and condoms fix that. Are they trying to protect her from 'getting hurt' emotionally? Seems silly to me since too much parental protection results in a person who cannot protect themselves and thus makes all the wrong choices in life once they've grown up and left the house.
Only the ob/gyn can say what's going on with your gf.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;251391]Okay first of all she needs to get to her ob/gyn and get checked out.
Blood = not good.
Her Mom won't let her be sexually active and yet let's her be on BCPs. Ooookay! Do we have issues about sex perhaps? What exactly are they thinking here? They are trying to protect her from getting pregnant/diseased? BCPs and condoms fix that. Are they trying to protect her from 'getting hurt' emotionally? Seems silly to me since too much parental protection results in a person who cannot protect themselves and thus makes all the wrong choices in life once they've grown up and left the house.
Only the ob/gyn can say what's going on with your gf.[/QUOTE]
Her mom is suffering from depression/ I guess is always medicated. She thinks that everyone treats their teenager like that. You can't argue with her, she won't have it. She throws a bitch fit about it. There is literally no changing her mind. She doesn't trust me or her.
I think I'm going to wait until after her period and see if the problem is fixed. If not we're going to have to figure out something to do.
She's 17 and can't make her own ob/gyn appt?
Tell Mommy Dearest that she wants to consult the ob/gyn about the brand of BCPs she's on to see if there isn't one her body would like better.
What's Mommy Dearest going to do when Daughter goes off to college?
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;251407]She's 17 and can't make her own ob/gyn appt?
Tell Mommy Dearest that she wants to consult the ob/gyn about the brand of BCPs she's on to see if there isn't one her body would like better.
What's Mommy Dearest going to do when Daughter goes off to college?[/QUOTE]
She's 16, and apparently she had her first one scheduled a month ago but had to cancel because she was on her period?
She's also revealed to me that she didn't start her period until she was in 8th grade, which is unusual for her height/weight. So when she did it was unbearably painful and ever since then she never had a period until she started taking the birth control pills which helped regulate them.
And my guess is probably try to control her some how. Like I said she thinks that she's right and that everybody else is wrong, and nothing will change her mind on the whole issue.
She doesn't have to worry about being on her period to go see her ob/gyn but wait until Brandye our resident doc returns.
Part of being a parent is letting go so your kids learn how to handle themselves and to make their own decisions. If you don't, you're setting your kids up for failure. Give your gf every opportunity to make decisions. It will help her out later.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;251438]She doesn't have to worry about being on her period to go see her ob/gyn but wait until Brandye our resident doc returns.
Part of being a parent is letting go so your kids learn how to handle themselves and to make their own decisions. If you don't, you're setting your kids up for failure. Give your gf every opportunity to make decisions. It will help her out later.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, I'm really not up to speed when it comes to the gynecologist/etc, so I'm just going by what she said. My guess is also she probably doesnt know how to even make an appointment for herself. She can't even drive alone yet, so I'm not sure how'd she get there secretly.
I guess she doesn't think that 16 is an appropriate age to let her daughter go out on dates and do other things alone. Her mom I guess used to trust her somewhat when she was 15, and then she went over to her boyfriends house. I guess they did some shit and when they broke up he went around telling everybody.. which in turn got back to her mother. Now she doesn't trust her to make her own decisions, because of that and what she hears from her friends. Like I said I'd love to help her, but I've tried talking to her mom in a polite way and asking if we could go see a movie together, and I could tell she was really trying to resist bitching about it. So I just dropped it.
She'll be an adult in TWO years. Is she ready?
She'd better make a start practicing now.