please help me

[alexandria]

Hi, I had sex for the first time last weekend, and we used a condom but I'm not on the pill or anything else. I tried to talk to my mom about going on the pill for my bad cramps when I get my periods, but she wouldn't let me.

That's not all my problems unfortunately. When I usually get my period, it doesn't come on the same day every month .. but it's usually around the same time period varying 3 or 4 days. Well, last month I got it on the 14th - 21st ... however this month (November) I still haven't gotten it and it's really scaring me.

Is there anything I can do to tell if I am without buying a test?

Please help me, thanks.

[Brandye]

Well, you have learned so much about the responsibility of sex very quickly. At your apparent age, cycles are unpredictable. If your period is erratic, so is your ovulation. That is one reason sex is a bit more "dangerous" for teens. By the time your cycles and hormones level off, things usually become more predictable. This may take seven years or so from the onset of menses.

A common experience all women have is waking up the next morning wondering if we got pregnant. The first period is the toughest to sweat out but you will be concerned thirtenn times a year for the 35 years. Welcome to womanhood.

The physical aspects of sex are easy to handle compared to the psychological aspects. After becoming sexually active too soon and not being willing to worry that much, I stopped for a couple years. By the time I became regularly active again, I had gained the confidence and maturity to handle the monthly worries.

You do not state your age. The greatest ploy going to get on the pill is "miserable periods." I hear demands from mothers that their daughters be put on the pill. I hear young women wanting the pill and willing to do anything to get on it but the mother prevents it. If you do get on the pill, take it EXACTLY as directed. There are threads here on pregnancy because of using the pill erratically. That increases the possibility of pregnancy.

Buy a test and use it as directed. You will experience every symptom of pregnancy known to womankind in your imagination.