dont want 2 get her pregnant

[Jesus_has_a_cat]

I am absolutly paranoid that the first time i have sex with my gf i am going 2 get her pregnant and it will ruin our lives, god im a chearfull person!

Firstly i will wear a condom, what other things can i do at the same time to reduce the chances of getting her pregnant? isnt there a time of the month that she is less likely to get pregnant?

[demonbuttercup]

there isn't really a way to pick a good time of the month. especially girls who are younger and/or teens. even if it seems like our periods are always on time, it doesn't mean our ovulation is.
the best bet would be condoms and her on the pill, but that isn't always accessible.
i would use condoms w/ some sort of spermicidal gel/foam.

[LittleFury]

Ok. there are a few things that you could do. First, she could go on a pill or patch or a shot. Then, you could try to have sex a first week after she has her period, only it's not as reliable. You should use spermicide on outside and inside of the condom and inside of her vagina, and she could use either a cervical cap or a diaphram. Just don't double up on the condom, more chance of it's breaking.

[amanda_uk]

as some one above has said it is hard to pin point a specific date where she is going to be less likely to get preegnant however for only a few days of the month women are likely to get pregnant and are at a higher risk so the chances are very slim if you are using the correct methods of contrception then there should not be any problems any way! i think you are being very sensible however i think you need to not worry as mcuh about some thing that is 99.9% not going to happen so enjoy it instead of worrying about it!

[Brandye]

Watch the numbers you are throwing around, Amanda. Sterilization is the only way to be that safe.

Short answer is simply do not do it. Get to a Planned Parenthood or similar organization and both of you get educated. Ignorance is the leading cause of unexpected pregnancy. A condom plus vaginal jelly is about as certain as it gets. If 100 women having regular sex use condom plus spermicidal jelly every time for one year, three will become pregnant. That is about the same certainty that the hormonal methods (pill, shot, implants, patch) will give you.

[Jesus_has_a_cat]

thanks for all the advice, could you tell me more about these vaginal jellys, becuase it is the first i have heard of them! how easy are they to get, any brand names that are the best? I know ignorance is usually the problem to unwanted pregnacys, thats why im looking for advice on this site. Of course a planning clinic would be better, but im not that confident and i dont want 2 scare my g/f off!

[demonbuttercup]

here i did a google search
LINKS
i think you could also use a lube that has a spermicide.
like littlefury said, take some and put it inside the condom and use some on the outside too. ive also heard that having it on the inside makes it feel better for the guy, so thats good.

and tell your g/f all this is just part of making the decision that you are ready for sex. its a big step you can't act weird or shy about it.
its tough i know. i remember my first trip to the DR to get on the pill. i was scared sh*tless! my heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. but really, it wasn't nearly as bad as i had anticipated. so it was all worth it.
tell her thats the same way about her first time, you imagine its going to be horrible and usually its only just a little uncomfortable.
good luck

[Brandye]

Honey,

If you have never heard of spermicidal jelly, you are not ready to start having sex. Get to a Planned Parenthood or other educational place and learn what sex is all about. You are correct in being fearful. Too many end up in my office because they did not know how to protect themselves or even whether they were ready to take the risks.

I know from experience that once a owman becomes sexually active, the period is an issue of concern every month. Most teenagers do not need that additional pressure in their lives.