I notice my brother and father with their hands in their pants a lot and they look like they're masturbating because their hand are moving. It really makes me uncomfortable when it's just me with one or the other when they do it and I have to keep myself from blushing even if there's more than just me in the room (i.e. me, my mom, and my dad).
When my dad went to drop me off at school one day I saw him doing it. I told him it looked like he was masturbating and he just told me he didn't notice he was doing it and took his hand out of his pants.
A few months ago I saw my boyfriend doing it while we were on web cam. I asked him why it seems like guys do that and he told me that his penis hurts sometimes and that rubbing makes it feel better, which I understood since he was wearing jeans that are a little tight for him.
But my thing is that it seems my brother and father do it almost every other day and it just doesn't feel normal to me. Again, it makes me really uncomfortable when they do it and sometimes, due to trying not to blush, I feel myself getting wet.
So is it masturbating or just relieving themselves of pain?
Yes, that's an interesting habit! I've seen many guys do it... even at work! From what I know of, it mostly is more like repositioning the stuff in their pants and/or having a little scratch. They usually do it when feeling comfortable, in a not so formal situation. And they do not do it while paying attention to any representation stuff, like you would at a customer-meeting. Maybe it's also a result of that I work in a company that consists mainly of men, so that there is less shame in doing such things amongst colleagues... Still, I find it odd... I think they'd look very surprised if I would reposition my breasts in my shirt while talking to them! ;) They usually stop immediately whenever I just stare at it a few seconds. So that could be your remedy; make it stop before you go totally uncomfortable by making them realize it!
Anyways, let's hear from the guys what they have to say about it! :)
* Masturbating? No, not really.
* Pleasuring themselves? Yes.
* Repositioning their "equipment"? Possibly.
* Scratching an itch? Maybe.
To actually masturbate means to stimulate the penis til a climax results--
resulting in wet, sticky, under ware!
Fondling their penis from time to time, may be an unconscious action to mounting sexual tension and/or arousal, and it can also be a reaction to simply having a pleasurable moment by himself.
This is nothing to be concerned about; however, if the practice bothers or embarrasses you when they do it in front of you, why not bring it to their attention and ask them to wait until you are out of sight. Please be pleasant about your comments as they may not realize that what they are doing is noticeable.
> I asked him why it seems like guys do that and he told me that his penis hurts sometimes and that rubbing makes it feel better, which I understood since he was wearing jeans that are a little tight for him.
His penis hurts probably not because of the restrictive clothing; because he was aroused, his penis was hard, and, when in a high state of arousal, a fully engorged penis can be uncomfortable.
> But my thing is that it seems my brother and father do it almost every other day and it just doesn't feel normal to me.
They may do it even more often--or not, it all depends upon the the amount of sexual tension they are experiencing at any given time. It is important for women to understand that many things can turn a guy on and at any time. This is foreign to many women who must go thru a process of becoming aroused and who do not become as naturally aroused nearly as often from outside stimuli. Girls and women sometimes become very upset and mad after just having made love to their guy, only to find him masturbating a half hour or so later! They believe that they are a failure at pleasuring him when in fact all that is happening is that he has acquired a lot of sexual tension because of nothing they have done or failed to do. It is the way we are "wired", and, the ability to become aroused from sight, smell, touch, and thoughts any time all the time.
> So is it masturbating or just relieving themselves of pain?
In addition to the above, doing this just feels good.
Your boyfriend may also be trying to send subliminal messages. :confused:
What boys fail to understand is that girls find such "signals" embarrassing, and not the turn on they are hoping for. All the more reason not to make too much out of this.
I hope this is of help. Got questions?
[QUOTE=dancingdoc2;258614]* Masturbating? No, not really.
* Pleasuring themselves? Yes.
* Repositioning their "equipment"? Possibly.
* Scratching an itch? Maybe.
To actually masturbate means to stimulate the penis til a climax results--
resulting in wet, sticky, under ware!
Fondling their penis from time to time, may be an unconscious action to mounting sexual tension and/or arousal, and it can also be a reaction to simply having a pleasurable moment by himself.
This is nothing to be concerned about; however, if the practice bothers or embarrasses you when they do it in front of you, why not bring it to their attention and ask them to wait until you are out of sight. Please be pleasant about your comments as they may not realize that what they are doing is noticeable.
> I asked him why it seems like guys do that and he told me that his penis hurts sometimes and that rubbing makes it feel better, which I understood since he was wearing jeans that are a little tight for him.
His penis hurts probably not because of the restrictive clothing; because he was aroused, his penis was hard, and, when in a high state of arousal, a fully engorged penis can be uncomfortable.
> But my thing is that it seems my brother and father do it almost every other day and it just doesn't feel normal to me.
They may do it even more often--or not, it all depends upon the the amount of sexual tension they are experiencing at any given time. It is important for women to understand that many things can turn a guy on and at any time. This is foreign to many women who must go thru a process of becoming aroused and who do not become as naturally aroused nearly as often from outside stimuli. Girls and women sometimes become very upset and mad after just having made love to their guy, only to find him masturbating a half hour or so later! They believe that they are a failure at pleasuring him when in fact all that is happening is that he has acquired a lot of sexual tension because of nothing they have done or failed to do. It is the way we are "wired", and, the ability to become aroused from sight, smell, touch, and thoughts any time all the time.
> So is it masturbating or just relieving themselves of pain?
In addition to the above, doing this just feels good.
Your boyfriend may also be trying to send subliminal messages. :confused:
What boys fail to understand is that girls find such "signals" embarrassing, and not the turn on they are hoping for. All the more reason not to make too much out of this.
I hope this is of help. Got questions?[/QUOTE]
What would be the best way to tell them though? I noticed telling my dad that it looked like he was masturbating made him feel embarrassed.
Also, I guess I understand the sexual tension since I feel the muscles in my vagina tense up and I have the urge to rub. But I try to ignore it when people are around or got to the bathroom to rub. Do guys just do it subconsciously or something?
And my boyfriend just needs to take off his shirt and look at me lustfully to turn me on...but in a shy submissive way. Rubbing himself under his pants has no effect. He should've taken off his pants slowly then played with himself. All the while having a lustful gaze. ;)
Ok, I could understand how this may work in the privacy of the home. Though I could understand your feeling of discomfort, Karimah. If I were you, I'd tell my brother/father at the moment they do it that it makes me feel uncomfortable and would they please not do it with me around. Not in an attacking fashion, yet in a way they know you mean it. Then again, I lack experience with fathers and brothers on this, so who am I to give advice? :)
But doc, what about guys doing this on the job? Repositioning/scratching, though inappropriate, certainly feels like a better explanation. If the guys are really "pleasing" themselves, that makes me feel conscious of the fact I'm a woman, while on the job I just think of them as colleagues and would like to think they do as well. Or at least; act that way! I mean: comon, get a hold of yourself!
I work with the guy I have sex with and I haven't seen him do it on the job, just at home. He would have way more reason to feel that 'pleasing'-urge with me around him than the other guys, wouldn't he? But we've strictly separated work from home and act accordingly. So I'd say it's all about controlling behavior. Maybe the others fail to do that... That seems a little pathetic :( And even though I was taught a bit differently, I would like to think of men as civilized and sophisticated. So help me out here! :)
[QUOTE=RedRoses;258628]If I were you, I'd tell my brother/father at the moment they do it that it makes me feel uncomfortable and would they please not do it with me around. Not in an attacking fashion, yet in a way they know you mean it.[/QUOTE]
Now how would I respond when my brother calls me a pervert? He does it whenever I notice something in that area of him like when his cell phone holder was pulling his pants down (he doesn't wear underwear) and I could see his pubic hair or when there was a huge hole in the back of his lounge pants. My brother's 18 and I'm 19.
I can imagine how such a responds would make you feel embarrassed, even though you are the one making an honest request... I think I would point that out. That I'm making a request and I'd expect him to take that seriously. I can imagine how a brother may be a pain in the ass and how he makes fun out of it. But hey, if you haven't tried, then you won't know how he responds :)
Maybe try it out on dad first? He's more likely to respond as an adult and maybe set an example for your brother.
Us guys are just animals. Well not all of us. Guys do that a lot specialy when a bunch are together. To be honest I really don't know why we do it, maybe were just trying to protect our assets, you know like cupping them to protect them. Talking to your dad and brother might work unless your brother is into trying to bug you and then he will do it more often. Talking to your dad might work, but talking to your brother might just let him know he has another way to iritate you.
At least talk to your dad, he should know that this makes you uncomfortable and find a way so stop doing it in your presence.