Ahhh! I don't know whats wrong with me lately.
For the past 2 months i have NO sex drive whatsoever! Like, no urge to masturbate and no real urge to go at my girl (only after much stimulation!).
It's frustrating me so badly, because before 2 months ago i had the urge at least once a day! Now i NEVER feel like it.
And when i do get in the mood, i find it hard to get a full-on erection (this never happened until a couple months ago!!!) everytime i try to put on a condom my penis goes softer and i find it like impossible to put on properly. It seems to get stuck around my head and i have to literally stretch it to pull it down.
And when i'm doing something with a girl, my penis just like goes kinda numb and nothing feels that good anymore! In the past week i've been with my girl 5 times and only ONCE i orgasmed, and only then because i did it myself (took forever too!)
What is wrong with me!? I'm 17 years old and this has NEVER happened before the past 2 months.
I'm under alot of stress because i'm in the middle of my finals and graduation and everything, and my new girlfriend is the first girl i'm with who is always up for anything.
I am SO frustrated! Someone please give me some advice! PLEASE!
Is it just performance anxiety? Or is it retarded ejaculation? Or am i just worrying too much that it's becoming an actual problem?
Ohhh i just want to be a normal horny teenager again!!!!
Hey, Redman. I'm glad to hear things are going better.
Have you tried to do anything about the foreskin issue? It can be remedied. Check out:
Tight Foreskin
Hope this helps.
[QUOTE=Quote ]For most of the year i've struggled with lust (horny like everyday) that it started to become a problem, so i took down all my posters of chicks, got rid of all my porn and decided to back off a bit from girls. Could this have something to do with it?
[/QUOTE]
I think that could have a lot to do with it. You went from one extreme to the other. From 11 on the horny scale to a 1.
Maybe you just freaked yourself out so much and let yourself believe that feeling lust was a "bad" thing and know your brain wont let you enjoy any kind of lust or sexual feelings.
You have to figure out where there is a happy medium.
everything in life is usually ok in moderation. Its when you let it control your life in someway that has negative consequences, thats when it becomes a REAL problem.
What made you decide it was becoming a problem to begin with?? Like what happened that finally just crossed the line?
Hey guys, thanks for the replies! It's calmed me down alot..
Yeah, see this is the first girl i've really 'been' with (and i'm still a virgin). She really wants to have sex, but i've got all these problems, like keeping an erection while trying to put it on, tight foreskin (frenulum breve) and i take so long to orgasm (not necessarily a bad thing for her, but for me yes!)
Tonight i got her off twice but she couldn't return the favour!
She gave me a blowjob for like 30 minutes, and tonight i actually felt it sometimes (either she's getting better or i'm slowly overcoming my problem! hopefuly both..) but she had to go, so there was alot of pressure on me to come.. I don't know, i just wish i could share the experience with her..
and i'm scared of what will happen the first time we have sex, like will i be unable to stay hard? Will i be unable to put the condom on properly? (I seriously can't, it gets stuck around my head then ends up all wrinkled and not fitting properly), and will my foreskin hurt too much?
I keep reassuring her that its not her fault.. but i am starting to get worried that this is more than just stress. Is there any way to increase my sex drive? I've read that certain foods/vitamins can help a little bit.
For most of the year i've struggled with lust (horny like everyday) that it started to become a problem, so i took down all my posters of chicks, got rid of all my porn and decided to back off a bit from girls. Could this have something to do with it?
I'm really sorry this is so long... and i know that you guys can't miraculously fix me and my problems, but i would like some advice, and it makes me feel better just to be able to talk about it.
Thanks alot!
Hello there-
Hope you're feeling better. Just wanted you to know you're not alone. I've been seeing someone for about 4 months and he's had a similar experience. I even started thinking that he wasn't into me or something about me was the issue. Fact is that he got stressed and overworked. Not to mention having lost his dog not long ago. It all takes it's toll on your subconscious. He didn't realize that these things could affect him physically. He just thought he had to adjust to condoms, etc. While I'd love to jump him constantly, that's not why I'm with him. I guarantee that if your girl is interested in you (not just your parts
, then she'll stick around long enough for you to see more of her adventurous side.
Brandye is right. Sexual inclinations ebb and flow like the tide. LOL.
Many things can contribute to a lack of desire. Overwork, stress (which you mention), or drugs... be they street OR prescription. Something as simple as a new medication for a sinus problem could cause a lack of sexual arousal.
Since you specifically mention stress, I'm going to assume that's your problem... and DON'T get worked up over it. That's just more stress. Take some time... get passed your exams... and don't worry about sex. If you want to just cuddle with your girlfriend, that's fine, but don't put any more pressure on yourself than that. I'm guessing that you'll be back to normal soon.
Take care.
Because of the way sex is treated in modern society, we tend to approach as a separte part of life. It takes place, however, in the greater context of life. EVERYTHING going on in life can affect your response.
We women have the stereotype that men of your age are screwing machines who never think of or do anything else. That is an unfair stereotype because just as other issues affect our sexual desires, men are similarly affected.
Take some time alone, or at least forgetting sex. Clear your head and then pick up where you left off. It will not be long and your girlfriend should be tolerant.