[LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] I've read a number of articles here and on other web sites that refer to ED and PE, and none of the seem to quite fit what I'm experiencing, well, at least not when considering it as a whole.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] I know that it's not ED, as those have always come easily for me, been strong and solid, and still are.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] Earlier in my life, climbing the curve to the inevitable event took an agreeably reasonable time and was always concluded with a very satisfying fireworks of emotional and physical release. A sizable 'pop', if you will, the length and height of the curve was satisfying. The most satisfying, of course, was when we'd 'pop' together (generally a rarity - but I'd like it to be more, the feeling of her clamping down on me is just indescribably good!). Something that I'd like to experience more often.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] The last 10 years or so, the length (time) of the curve has shortened and the height of the curve has fallen. In the least satisfying cases the 'pop' would come after 3-4 strokes, and sometime the 'pop' was so weak that I barely noticed it, other than suddenly becoming flaccid or feeling the heat and sweat from post event skin flush. In these cases, this has left me with the impression of 'Is that all? If that's all, why bother?'[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] There is variance in the pattern in that the more foreplay and / or oral on me before would lengthen and heighten the curve a bit, but in general still not as satisfying as I'd like.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] In the last few months, my wife and I seems to have made more of an effort to 'get into the mood', slowing down to lengthen the curve, and to really 'connect' more at an emotional level. With our busy schedules with kids and their activities, we've start to make 'dates' to facilitate communication. This has also helped in the setting mood and heightening outcomes. In fact, I have found that it starts our minds working and imagining things in the hours before our 'date'. I figure that all this is on the good side.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] Even when making a date, getting all freshened up, and setting the mood, there are times when the curve's height and length aren't what I'd like. So just putting all the effort into the preparation helps allot (and I plan on continuing this part), but is no guarantee for satisfaction.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] I'm wondering if PC muscle exercises would help matters. I've recently started working on the mastering control techniques when I'm solo, and we have been using the start / stop method when we are together (which sometimes works and sometimes not). On a few occasions previously I tried the squeeze method, but have had limited success with that (is she the one that needs to apply the squeeze?). More often than not, I'd end up with a soaked hand and disappointment.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] I'm also considering the suggestion that I read about of doing a solo and then having a date as the second time seems to lengthen and heighten the curve nicely. Once I got a Viagra sample from my doctor, and I was pleasantly surprised and pleased at how much it shortened the refectory period. It also lengthened and heightened the second time around, which I really enjoyed, but my wife not so much (I guess I took a little bit too long for her - I thought it was great!)[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]Yes, we've slid into a routine, hard not to after 20 some years of being married. Some kissing and fondling first, heavy petting each to the other next, on rare occasions oral on her until she 'pops' or usually fingers, and then my turn (usually 1 of 3 different positions), and done. Yup, a routine, but I'm trying to introduce some new things and have done so in the past as well (seems like I'm always the one to do so). I found the positions on the web site interesting, showed her the web, but she doesn't seem to be all that interested or excited at trying new ones although she's indulged me on occasion, and we've tried 2 new ones, but I didn't last as long as we both would have liked.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] I'd like to work up to enhancing our activities from just once for each of us to twice for each of us. It seems to me that this would help in that the second ones are better, at least for me. I don't think she's ever had a second one, but I'd like to give her one if she is willing (seems like I can only give her one with oral or fingers). So far she's said that one's enough for her. So I don't know if she'll go for it or not.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] My wife has been really good about all this, and is not being negative, but rather taking it for what it is. She says that it's part of becoming old, 50 years for me later this year, but I'm not certain I have to accept this, and was wondering what I can do to hold this aspect of age at bay a little while longer?[/SIZE][/FONT]
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[FONT=Arial][SIZE=2] So the questions that I've raised:[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
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[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]Would PC muscle exercises help extend control, heighten and lengthen the curve?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]I plan continuing the mastering technique. Will this help?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]Is she the one that needs to apply the squeeze?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]In general, are these symptoms a sign of age? If so, what is most reasonable thing to do to hold off this aspect of age?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]Given the limited experience with Viagra (or similar), is this a reasonable option to help address this?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]What's the best way to work in, or work up to, a second time around for both of us?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]What's the best way to for us to 'pop' at the same time?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]Is there a particular position that would help me extend my endurance, and yet satisfy her, or at least keep her interested?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
[*][LEFT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2]Of the things to do (seem to be a number of possibilities), which is most likely to produce the best results?[/SIZE][/FONT][/LEFT]
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Thu, 09/23/2010 - 22:34
#1
Advice Sought
You cannot beat Father Time and some of your symptoms (decreased production, especially) is a function of age. Habit is also the enemy of attaining the soaring pleasure that you seek. It seems as though you two are addressing this together and that is good.
Working on the PC muscles will certainly help maintain the power of your ejaculation and would be worthwhile.
Using the squeeze technique does require a cooperative partner, which you seem to have, to do the squeezing. You cannot wait too long to apply the squeeze because men reach a point of no return when the ejaculation is on its way whether or not you want it. Usually ten to fifteen seconds or a bit more is too late and she will get sticky fingers.
Sounds like the sildenafil works for you. Talk to your doctor and, because it helps with the refactory period, one by yourself or a handjob by her may be helpful and then she will not object to a slightly lengthened period of thrusting. We do have our limits. I am good for twelve or fifteen minutes but if he gets to twenty, he will find himself on the floor - enough is enough.
Many women infrequently even want a second time around. I, for instance, and that more with women than with men. Talk this one over.
Reaching orgasm together is a hit or miss thing. Enjoy it when you get it but there is not much planning to be done. The whole "ladies first movement" is based upon her getting there first because it is generally a bit lengthier and more complicated process. I do enjoy reaching orgasm with a penis in me but, alas, that does not happen commonly. I do have a favorite position that increases the likelihood and my contractions often set him off.
The position, which may help with your next to last item, is lying on my back with knees draped over the man lying on his side crass-wise to me. That gives each of us access to all the critical parts of each - my breasts and clitoris can be stimulated by either of us and his scrotum, lower penis and whatever else can be reached by either of us. I note that men tend to last a bit longer (no need for him to tense up to hold himself up) and some have even stated that the stimulation of the penis from my hand stimulating my own clitoris is exciting.
[SIZE=2]Brandye,[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2] Thanks for the good advice.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2] I like the cross position you've described, as it does in fact let me last longer than when I go deep (which pops my cork pretty quick - must be just the right combination of stimulation). It also lets me better gauge how much stimulation for me, and how much for her, and it really is fantastic to feel her clamping down and contracting on me. Guaranteed to pop, and very satisfying.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2] I'll speak to my regular physician about a prescription next time I have an appointment, probably when I need to get blood drawn for liver function levels (on a statin for cholesterol), or something else. Doesn't seem right to make an appointment just for the prescription.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2] I've been doing PC's on and off for awhile now, and figure to do more of them more regularly in the future, I think they might already be starting to pay off.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2] Most recently, my wife went to the local adult toy store for a gag gift for her sister that getting married, and she's been hinting that she picked up something special for herself as well. I can't wait, but she says I'll have to wait for a few more days. Well, OK, but I can't hardly wait. Maybe she's finally picked up an interesting toy?[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2] Do cock rings really work? Won't they, or couldn't they do some damage? Just doesn't seem like restricting blood flow like that is a good idea. What do you think?[/SIZE]