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I sort of have the same problem with my gf. I haven't really solved it yet but I am getting closer. let me tell you what I know and maybe you can help me at the same time.
1. communication is good BUT you can't make her reaction your sole topic and you can't ask her about it too much. you should be there for fun first and foremost.
2. you can't say anything negative about her. the things she does or tries to do. her smell or taste. thats a real big thing. always make her feel comfortable. tell her how sexy she looks and how much you like the taste and smell of her.
3. dont expect her to moan. probably wont happen for awhile.
4. open up yourself. moan when she does something you like. tell her what you like and what feels best. and just have fun.
thats all I can think of for the moment. I'll check back later.
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