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> if you have lube, oil, or even use spit for a hand job then its not so bad, but just your hand and nothing else may not feel too good. at least that is the idea and thoughts my husband gives me
Yup, I agree; although, by way of some clarification. Until the advent of the internet with its ability to locate and disseminate lots of information easily and rapidly, my guess is that most boys and young men up until the last decade did not use much if any lube until they were older and either experimented with it out of general curiosity, or, after they were in a relationship in which they were counseled to use it by an older wiser adult.
I wouldn't be surprised if young boys right out of puberty are using a lubricant some or much of the time during masturbation for two reasons: first, because the sensations they get from are much more intense; second, there is more variety when it comes to stroking. Clamping down and using a lot of pressure is easier, with less chance of causing friction burns and scabs; using little or no pressure and just grazing the skin offers different sensations than the other method.
If your husband masturbates in the usual way, dry, and it is and has been good for him, then the difference he refers to is when you take over. While women know how to stroke a penis, their technique is often unintentionally rough and jerky and not nearly as pleasurable because they have not been shown how best to accomplish the mission. This is where guidance plays an important part as does verbal and non-verbal feedback. There is an article on all this in the Index. Essentially, each of us should show our partner how we do it when home alone, then, take their hand and move it over a few sessions until s/he learns to mimic our unique and specific technique.
Please try the information in the article and see if this helps in your situation.
I hope this is of help. Got questions?
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