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Originally Posted by springfever
Well, I dunno why some have claimed you as "ugly" ...coz u r not. You really aren't that bad looking at all, but can understand you being self consious of your ears.
As I said...be urself. You say u hav tried flirting with no success
...how do u generally flirt? ...maybe learning some tactics in this area could avoid you falling into *friend zone*...
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I usually start off with a "hi" or "whats up". Girls normally push me away after that. I can see from their negative body language that they want me to leave so I just leave.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Humble
Having now seen your pictures, I don't think your physique is what repels women. You seem to be lean and with everything in the right place, so women should probably find you attractive. Well, yes, the ears do protrude to the sides and are unusual in that sense. I honestly don't know to what extent that would be a dealbreaker for most women - I just don't know. If you truly believe that your ears are your biggest obstacle, it might be worth considering an operation to change that. Yes, you have mentioned that you are unwilling to change for women and that they should like you as you are, but from what you are saying they don't. I am sure a woman will eventually like you for your personality and such, but in order to get to that stage, she probably has to find you physically attractive at least initially. Again, I don't know that your ears are behind this, but since you seem to be pretty convinced that is the case, you have a fairly easy workaround...
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Massdebator
Let me start this off by saying that this reply of mine is mainly for the benefit of those users just now involving themselves in this thread. My advice to you is to listen to EEK and let the subject drop, because as she said earlier, "You can't fix stupid." This Franklin guy is either a (very good) troll or he is a person who will be beyond our counsel until he can overcome his own personal demons.
Humble, you're only telling him what he wants to hear. His issues are much more deeply rooted than his physical appearance. He's pinning the blame on his ears, because he is in denial that his attitude is the number one obstacle between him and a date. You said it yourself when you said, "I don't think your physique is what repels women."
Franklin, I will try one last time, and I'm being generous here. Your attitude towards life, friendship, and whatever else may be all well and good, but there's a reason why your female acquaintances aren't comfortable with developing relationships with you beyond friendships. Your attitude, specifically towards sex, romance, and 'all that jazz', is in dire need of adjustment. You objectify women and only think about your goals, your needs, and what you want to get from them. Women (and men for that matter) are wary of this kind of behavior, and for good reason.
To top it all off, you refuse to reflect back upon your own behavior and do some self-examination, nor do you take criticism well (unless, of course, your critics are just spoon feeding you what you want to hear).
Franklin, I don't need you to quote me and respond to this unless you choose to write something other than 'I already did this or that' or 'this doesn't apply to me because I'm ugly.' You've broken down all of our advice into its component parts time and time again. You've told us all that you've "been doing what (we've) told (you) for years." Did anyone ever tell you that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts? You have to do all of what we've offered, all the time, except the surgery. There are cheaper, less dramatic ways to feel less self-conscious and improve your self image, and you certainly don't need the surgery to get a real woman.
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I don't see women as sex objects. I see women as people. I get to know women. What I mainly want from a woman is love. I have my standards. I think about what a girl wants. Not every girl is going to be same. However I do them respect. I am always there for my friends men and women. I am sure most girls want to go out. I have a job which will pay for such things. I don't want a girl to pay for our dates.
I think about how I behave. I don't disrespect people. I don't cause drama. I don't get into fights. I don't any enemies. I like to have fun. I am good person. I can also be very serious when dealing with something important. I know when to joke, and when to be serious.
I show women respect. I don't treat them as objects. My friend Clare told me yesterday I make her day because I am funny person. My coworkers who are mostly women joke with me. I never had any problems with them. They tell me to do something, and I will do it right on the spot.
I am not expecting a woman to be perfect. I don't care if she has small breast. Most of the girls I have asked out on dates have small breast. I am not expecting a girl to be perfectly fit. A little belly fat is not a problem, being fat is a problem and I won't give a fat girl the time of day. She may not wear the top brand of clothes. I don't expect a girl to dress pretty everyday because I know most girls don't. All I want is a girl to at least wear clean clothes and be clean.
I get to know women before thinking about liking them more than a friend. I don't say to myself "wow she is hot so I must ask her out". I have never asked out a girl who I did not know. I want to get to know who she is. What are her hobbies? What type of music does she likes? What do she expect from a man? What kind of men has she dated before? What are her goals in school and in life? These are just a sample of things I get to know from women. I don't learn this in one day. I understand that is a working progress. I look for things in women such as kindness, intelligence, humor, ect.
I am not perfect. There are certain things I don't have such as dancing skills, muscle, normal ears, etc. I am not expecting a woman to perfect. She will have her faults as well. I can over look her faults.
I am putting some of the blame on my ears. I have a good reason to do so. Women do make negative comments about my ears. I am not lying to you.