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"Porn is great because it's a sexual fantasy you can whack off to..." Very accurate, and sometimes, lacking other outlets, it's fine solo. When I first got married 35 years ago, maybe there was porn out there, but it must have been very unavailable to the mass public. When home video began in the early 1980s, my wife and I got a couple of bootlegged videos. They were pretty stupid and boring. Then porn Pay-per-View began showing up in certain hotel rooms, and THAT really turned my wife on. She would insist we go away for a night three or four times a year (our birthdays, anniversary and Valentine's Day!) so that we could have a night of wild sex. We didn't exactly use the porn as instruction, but rather as guides--what they did on the screen, we would do ourselves. We learned what we could do and what was just for silly show--neither of us liked the 'money shots', and we figured out that she could not have me finish up oral sex in her mouth, and we discovered that (for her, at least) anal penetration was impossible, but that anal stimulation was very enjoyable. We discovered that we liked certain positions better, could last longer in other positions, and we tried a lot of new ones, some of which were stupid, but a few of which we continued to enjoy regularly. It's not like we had no imagination ourselves, it's just that after 20+ years of marriage, the videos helped us explore new things--light bondage, role-play, dress-up, toys, tickling, etc. Not weird things, but interesting stuff we may never have ventured into on our own. The porn videos also sort of upped the ante on how long we could go--and we got VERY good at multiple multiple climaxes and prolonging foreplay and intercourse over longer periods of time, which was good for us, as we'd been pretty quick and over before then.
I'm no porn actor, and she was no porn queen, but we did do porn scenes together many times and always enjoyed them, except when we'd get too tangled up and uncomfortable, and end up laughing hysterically instead of climaxing--but sex SHOULD make you laugh out loud in the end anyway, right? After she died, I believe that the relationships I had afterward benefited greatly from my porn play--I helped the first girlfriend to her first anal orgasm and first squirting climax of her life (she was in her 50s and had had dozens of lovers before me!), so I don't think I did half bad. I was never a "porn addict", but I always liked it, and usually found it to be exciting and, if sometimes boring, also often instructional in a general way.
Michael
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