[youaintmyfriendpalooka]

Hey everyone,

I seem to be in a bit of a dilemma when it comes to my partner. Lately, we've been on rocky ground when it comes to her ex. In fact, it has been a sensitive subject since day one. They broke up about 6 months before I met her, but they were having sex after they 'broke up'. The last time they did it was about a week before we both started dating. I've been with her for about two years. The thing is they both promised they would remain friends after they broke up (I don't think having frequent sex with each other is being friends), and everythime she goes back to her home town, she has to see him because she says he is a friend. Now I do trust her, because I know that she hates cheating (two of her previous boyfriends have done it to her and she knows how much it hurt her that she couldn't do it herself).

I have tried numerous times to tell her that I don't want him around (although she doesn't see him often, but she does speak to him every few weeks), and she gets all defensive saying that she feels nothing for him. If she feels nothing for him, then why do they have to see each other? She claims that I'm trying to make her get rid of a friend, but i don't see him as a friend. Although there are a couple of her friends I don't like, I do not tell her to stop seeing them. She wasn't exactly comfortable with me still being a friend with one of my ex's (the respective ex is now back in her home country) and so I ended it because I knew the my relationship with my partner was more important to my life.

I love her dearly, to the point where I moved half-way across the world for her (and she did sort of ask for me to do that). Things were becoming fantastic before she went back to her home town and she saw him again. I didn't necessarily voice disapproval this time, but she knew I wasn't exactly happy about it. Now it's just about ruining the relationship.

Am I being too possesive? Or am I actually making a point that she doesn't see? Well if she's more interested in keeping a friendship with her ex-boyfriend, then I'll leave her, because I won't waste my time with her.

Any thoughts?