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Old 07-16-2009, 09:14 PM
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I am coming to this issue from a different perspective.

Frankly, I couldn't wait to get rid of my virginity because it seemed to me then, and still does now, to value ignorance, to foster fear of both men and sex, and to devalue an important ingredient of life. Also a girl's/woman's value does not lie between her legs - it lies in her heart, her mind, and in her character.

Furthermore, I have never regretted its loss.

But I made sure that it was always MY choice and MY decision whether to enjoy any particular man, which of course, is why I never regretted throwing my virginity away.

My point is that no matter what any guy may say, YOU are the OWNER of yourself and whether you do or do not do anything is YOUR decision to make. Whatever YOU decide he has to accept like it or not.

Guys will push, they will talk you into it, they will taunt you - call you chicken or something equally stupid, say "If you love me you will" or "you owe me" or whatever - it is all BS and doesn't matter so stop listening.

Instead, look at him, as he is right then and ask yourself if you REALLY desire this guy. Not like. Not love. None of that romance stuff. Then think - are you prepared? Do you have birth control? Does he have condoms? Does he have ANY idea what he is doing? Do you have any idea what you're doing? Are you drunk, drugged up, or just being stupid at that moment?

If you aren't prepared, if you aren't rational/sane/clear-headed, and you aren't willing to throw him down and jump his bones, then you should say No Thanks and just walk away. There will be other guys and other opportunities.

Do not worry so much about preserving your virginity. Worry about preserving and building your character.

Make it YOUR choice and ONLY YOUR choice.
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