[dancingdoc2]

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> This happened for a brief minute or two the time before this, but got it fine after she gave me oral for a bit, and we went ahead, but this last time we tried to it would be fine after we would do a little foreplay to get started, but every time I would try to, it would lose its rigidness the second I would try to penetrate.

I believe there are two factors at odds here that are at the source of your problem. First, if you believe that the way to a great orgasm is from lots and Lots and LOTS of stroking, this is not correct. This is the why of Foreplay and all the fooling around that goes on beforehand. As you noted, above, when you had a bit of Foreplay, your erection stood tall and firm! The second concern is nerves or what is known as "Performance Anxiety".

* A man should not enter a woman's vagina until he is on the raw edge of losing control--and then invited to enter, directly or indirectly.

* PE is quite common and comes from worrying about this, that, or the other. The fix is to quite simply stop worrying and to begin relaxing and enjoying.

Another possible culprit to losing your erection when attempting to enter might be if you have to apply some pressure to get inside. If the pressure is substantial this can apply pressure to the internal root structure of the penis inside the abdominal cavity and this will cause a loss of erection. I sort of doubt this is a problem as this usually only happens when attempting to get past the hymen, or later, if her vaginal opening is quite tight. It's a thought.

Now, let me talk a little about the last part of your post. Making love is not what we do to each other; it is what we do with and for each other in partnership. Explore and learn together. Talk to each other and give feedback on what you need now/next when caressing each other.

If you make love with these factors in mind, there should be no worrying, angst. You have to understand that all this is and will continue to be a learning experience, and when we learn new things, we are not likely to be perfect at them for a while. I understand that you want to do things properly, however, some understanding and flexibility on both your parts will help relax you.

Finally, although intercourse may be the ultimate goal, do not rush to get there. A couple of us regularly tell people that the "trip is more about the journey than the destination." This being the case, I believe that if you set the pace and the two of you proceed slowly, devoting lots of time to making out before ever getting to the foreplay stage, you will both become much more highly aroused. Women require no less than half an hour of Necking, Petting, and Heavy Petting, and we guys also benefit. So, take your time and enjoy the sights, smells, and pleasures along the way and when it is time to visit your "destination", you will be on pins and needles--and very ready.

Please read the articles listed in the Index that discuss making out as well as making love.

I hope this is of help. Got questions?