[EvilEvilKitten]

I have been gleefully married to the best man on earth for more than 30 years. We will remain married until we die. Nothing will change that. In the face of our committment to eachother, the odd affair/fling here and there is not at all important. We are both retired military and have faced the prospect of losing our beloved to enemy action. His words are consistent: "She has to come back. I'm too old to date." I have to admit that I'd miss him very much.

In the face of death, the extinction of your beloved, the literal blasting into oblivion and the picking up of body parts of your future together - how could mere adultery ever matter?

Imagine it. Sit in the dark some night playing Beethoven's Funeral March and live the 'identified only by DNA, closed coffin' end of your marriage. Then try to tell me that having some fling is of any importance.

We lived with that fear for 20 years. I am not going to cave and neither is he just because some 'mid-life Barbie/Ken' came along.

The point about ego is that your identity, your self-worth has to come from WITHIN yourself and can not depend upon others OUTSIDE of yourself. My husband's ego does not need me. My ego does not need him. We are not two wrecks frantically clinging onto eachother, needing the other to complete ourselves, but two strong individuals who choose to remain together sharing our lives because we are happiest together.