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Your relationship is NOT good or perfect or even anywhere CLOSE.
You have basically talked yourself into staying with a selfish, jealous man and think oooh this is ssoo great - except he doesn't find me attractive and he never initiates sex. And you are willing to have sex with someone who finds you eeeehh bearable - at least I don't have to put a paperbag over her head????
Honey - you have wasted 4 years of your life - DON'T waste anymore.
Get yourself out there and find a man who sweats bullets just at the sight of you! One who loses the power of speech if you wink at him!! Get the idea?
Stop settling for anything less!!
Think of what your life will be like:
1. after 30 years of enduring this crap and having kids, taxes, work as well.
2. after he finds someone who really DOES make him sweat bullets and he dumps you for her.
3. you find someone who is really just THAT into you but you're still hitched to this loser and your dream man moves on leaving you with this lump you call your boyfriend.
OH joy abounds...NOT.
That's not a relationship - that's a prison. Ditch him.
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