[moderatorIII]

You get bored by sex??? Then you aren't paying close enough attention to the details of what you're doing.

> Dating Expectations:

"I'm just hoping for the best of us, but of course, I expect the worst."

Sorry, you're almost there but the above - wrong attitude!

Life is a party! - you just went to the wrong one.

JOY attracts. Confidence attracts! Being FUN attracts.
So go forth and seek to CONQUER!

THAT'S the right attitude.
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> No matter what I do, it just won't come

In the absence of physical/medical issues - any problem with orgasms is in your head.

1. What is your attitude about sex? A poor attitude will kill orgasms.
2. Do you tense up, hold your breath, worry about having an orgasm? If so you are stopping yourself from having one even before it begins and there is nothing anyone can do to get you off.
3. Were you abused, sexually or otherwise? You will need professional help to fix this.
4. Do you want to retain power over yourself and/or over your bf? Based upon it felt odd so I pulled bacl" I'd say YES. To which Id' say: GROW UP & LET IT GO. Because you're ruinning your relationship with him and you're cheating/hurting yourself.
5. There is something wrong in your relationship that you are unwilling to acknowledge, discuss, and solve.

Do not blame him - it is not his job to give you anything beyond a helping hand/penis/mouth. YOU have to decide for yourself that sex is grand, sex is glorious, and my sexuality is my birthright!

Face Up, 'Fess Up, then Fix Up!
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> G-spot technique to orgasm

Yes, zero to 60 is reserved for us more experienced women. But that is rather the point: you still need at least 20 minutes of foreplay for the average woman to rev up her engines even for G-Spot caressing.

Or what did you think The Program was for??

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Palm upwards, using two fingers, curl the fingrtips upward and gently caress with those fingertips in a come hithe motion on her G-Spot (feels rather like a washboard) while moving your entire hand in and out - the speed depending upon her degree of arousal.

You will know when you have it right by her reaction.

Medical community or not - it is there and that is how you stimulate

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As a general rule - all pornography is fake until proven otherwise.

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> Results of choosing the wrong guy

You chose the wrong partner for the job and yes, men and women do that, but that does not mean the practice is wrong - it means you picked the wrong partner and some people are just louts. I have done it too but not for a while now, having developed my radar.

Which is the best reason to go out and play - radar development. Yes, it can be dangerous and you can get hurt - a misfortune of life really since I can't think of any activity where you can't get hurt.

And now, looking back, can you see how you yourself have changed by having been through the crucible? Now you stand up for yourself, know who and what you want, and have courage. *evil grin* Which I think is excellent!

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> EEK on virginity

Please stop thinking virginity is something precious and important - it isn't.
Unskilled labor on the one hand and the weak ego desiring to be the only one 'to possess' on the other - hardly an edifying combination.
Someone who knows what they want, who they want and knows what they're doing is much better and much more fun.

What you mean to say is a guy who is skilled enough to do it correctly and decent enough to give a damn about how you feel about it and isn't just in it for himself.

Correect?

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the reason I take it seriously is because there are far too many women who should know better who still believe that their pudenda is made of gold and should be worshipped by each and every male - just isn't going to happen and will wreck your love life.
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There is no "right guy" - not unless it is marriage. But when it is just for fun n games - almost any guy will do.
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> Unprotected sex - are you insane???

She needs to switch pills and you need to get your head examined.

NEVER have sex without wearing a condom - until you are married and trying to have children. PERIOD.

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> If you're going to indulge in adult fun, you'd best be adult about it.
YOU stay on the Pill and HE always wears a condom - each and every time and always a fresh one!
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> TEENAGE VIRGINITY--and, losing or keeping it

...that's not how SHE sees it.

In her mind, since she's menstruating, she's "ready to go!" - which is rather Medieval of her but, hey, some people are very 'historical'.

Let me remind all of you that the best time for a female to bear her children is during her 20's. ALL liasons during your teens should be considered 'learning opportunities' and nothing more.

To this end, the requirements are very strict.
1. School comes first. ALWAYS.
2. Birth Control is MANDATORY - you WILL be on The Pill - no arguments.
3. He WILL use condoms - again - ALWAYS - no arguments.
4. It is NOT love. - no matter what he says
5. YOU pick HIM - it is your sexuality - own it. If you want to say NO then say it and mean it and be prepared to walk home in the driving snowstorm if need be. NO DOORMATS.

If you cannot abide by ALL of the above - then stay a virgin until you are ready. Indulging in adult play require you to be adult about it. THINK it through BEFOREHAND.

And remember - just because you want to and/or you can does not mean that you should.
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> BigAznMan: I haven't got any sex for few years ;(

BigA, then improve yourself and your technique! No Whining!!
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> Places outside to have sex?

But all fantasies have to be tempered by reality - to keep yourself out of jail if nothing else.

Ticks, flies, mosquitoes, gila monsters, snakes, spiders, bears and bobcats, skunks, racoons, bats, posion oak/ivy/sumac, outraged landowners - all are hazards of outside recreation. Hypothermia in winter and hyperthermia in summer.

All of which is why I drive a big, and very well equipped, SUV.
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> EEK on Porn:

STOP IT.

This moaning over his pornography is the same as a man bitching about your romance novels.

This is fantasy escapism and has NOTHING to do with his committment to you. You aren't going to ditch him over that lovely hero from your latest romance are you? Of course not! So what are you complaining about??? He knows you are the best thing that ever happened to him and he's not about to ditch you for the latest porn star.

The problem here isn't him, dear, it is you.
You're being jealous of something that isn't real.

Stop it.

Instead of complaining - do The Program and blow his doors off sexually speaking. That should give him enough foreplay.
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> A Young Girl's Concerns for the First Time

Actually it won't be all that great because this is a classic case of the blind leading the blind as both of you have no idea of what you're doing.

So, there are several questions that must be asked:

1. have you masturbated on your own to orgasm?
2. have you had a gyne exam?
3. have you both done your blood work?
4. were you ever exposed to abuse between the ages of 4 to 7?

There are important reasons for each question.

BTW there is no need to 'make it special' for him - it already is 'special' for him and he's most likely worrying himself to death over it "performance anxiety" being what it is. Find, read, and then do (the best you can) the sticky post entitled The Program. It works very very well and will help you both get off on the right foot.
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> About being whole with yourself, first, before being whole within a relationship.

You have to be a whole person in your own right with a satisfying individual life before you can ask anyone else to join with you.
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> Sex becomes routine? HUH? Who says?

NOT ME!

Even after 30 years married and the only thing in my hand is a small bottle of lubricant as I LEAP into joyous union. The only thing a person needs is enthusiasm! Pony up, baby!
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> EEK on spellling

SPELL THE WORD CORRECTLY

M-A-S-T-U-R-B-A-T-E

Jeez!
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> How about the shape (of a penis)?

Doesn't matter.
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> Her old boyfriends

> This girl ive been starting to go out with has told me that her 2 old boyfriends are trying to get back with her and texting and calling her all the time. Is there any way I should handle this or should I just stay out of the way and tell her to be with whoever makes her happy? I dont know what to do?

This is her problem to deal with. None of your business at all. As far as you are concerned, they do not exist.

So, carry on as you normally would with her or any other girl.

IF she wants you do to something about it, however, that is a very BAD sign and you should get rid of her at that point.
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> EEK on dating with a clear head

STOP DRINKING.
&
STOP BEING EXCLUSIVE WHEN DATING.

There. Problem solved.
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People - you have to understand that you're special because you are you - not because someone is just "with" you and you alone.

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> EEK on Prenuptial agreements:
If you want to really protect your assets - don't get divorced or don't get married in the first place..

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> EEK on Spice:

The Program, The Four Hotspots and Body Worship are all articles you should be reading and then using - because it may not be her, it may be you sucking up all the oxygen in the room so she figures why bother he's not listening to me anyway.

Because if your sex life needs spicing up - you're not doing it right.