[moderatorIII]

What follows are a few of the typical questions and concerns we receive from members in which EvilEvilKitten {EEK) has chosen to respond. If you would like short answers with wit, wisdom, and, common sense, {EEKisms) to some common concerns, begin looking here.


> Dylan79: How do I get my wife more wet

Ahem..are you listening?

You're NOT thrilling her, buddy, therefore she's not getting wet.

First thing is to read my two articles. Next thing is to get the right attitude which is a combination of masculine heat tempered with a respect for the feminine. You must understand that if unleashed, her desires can completely overwhelm you.

The trick is to unleash her desires. You cannot DEMAND this, you can only INVITE her.

So while you are moving through the steps outlined in The Program esp during the body worship murmur gently how desirable she is, how absolutely wonderful you find her, and yet, do NOT let her reach orgasm. What you want her to do is to get so frustrated that she attacks you.

Poke the tigress with a stick in the hope of getting her to pounce upon you.

Afterwards, scoop her up into your big strong arms say WOW! and swing her around whilst laughing - CELEBRATE! REJOICE!

and then tell her she needs never hide from you again, you can take all she cares to give you.

Got it?


> Mr. Saint: Is it a Joke
So I am kind of dating this girl.

You should stop JOKING and start taking yourself and your relationships seriously. Because if you don't, no one else will. This is why your relationship fizzled out in the first place. Learn to never say something you do not mean. If you play games then so will she and you'll be back here asking questions...again. So are you a man who values his time, his relationships, and his friends or are you just some kid pretending to be grown up?


> duh477: How to not seem needy...

You want to hang out once a week and build a relationship with a girl by doing that. You ask girls out and they say no. Girls date/go out with you once or twice and then pass you by. Have I got it all?

OK

1. You're asking the wrong girls out.

2. They are not interested in you and it is no good asking them why because they're trying to be nice and won't tell you that you're BORING.

3. Hanging out is NOT the way to ask any girl out as it implies you're not serious. You just want any warm body next to you so you don't get lonely.

What to do:

1. Look for those girls who are interested in you, They will show it in their body language, mannerisms, and glances. Some might even ask you out. Those are the girls with whoom you should be dealing.

2. Stop boring her to tears! Find out, by listening to her, what she likes and then go and do that! Since most girls have more than one interest, you can mix it up - doing interest A one week and interest B the next and so on. Ask her questions, talk with her, interact and respond.

3. Ask her out to a specific event at a specific place, date, and time based upon step 2 above - in line with her interests and/or yours. Yes, you do get to reveal your likes too. Treat her as important by dating as a man dates, not as a kid 'just hanging out'.

Do you understand?


> Anonyme: Inexperience with dating & sex, questions

Your error has been to swallow all the trash you have been taught about sex. Sex does not mean love. Love does not mean sex. The two are separate until you choose to join them together. Love is the deep and abiding emotional bond between people. Sex is the physical expression of desire. Do NOT confuse the two. Sex does not make anyone fall in love with anyone. It is entirely possible to enjoy sex with someone you do not even like let alone love. You can have and enjoy sex with more than one person simultaneously - it is just adult playtime.

Slut is a term used to denigrate a woman who enjoys sex with whomever she pleases, when and where and how she pleases, by those who have issues about sex. They think she's debased. They think sex is debasing. Oddly enough, they do not apply the same disgust to men who do the same sexual thing so there is more than a little sexism involved. Stop using the term yourself.

The reason why sex is 'not so great' according to your friends, is that they and/or their lovers are so very BAD at it. Sorry, but you wuld be dismayed to find how bad most people are at sex. They spend so little time studying it, so little time exploring their partners, and so little time discussing ways, means, aspects, etc. Hence the very real need for this forum. Please also understand that everyone has his/her own sexual style. This is over and above their level of sex drive.

Virginity is something of a handicap, as you have found, but NEVER lie to anyone ever again about your sexual status. It is unfair to do so. MEn are perfectly aware thta women will hold any poor outcomes against not only them but also against any other subsequent man that woman may encounter because women do. They have heard it all before. Naturally, a man would hesitate to "deflower" you unless he was a complete uncaring lout.

What you need now is a "skilled practioner" who will treat you with the consideration that you require, teach you the ropes, and discuss with you all of those ways, means, and aspects I mentioned earlier. For this, forget men of your own age. They don't know enough yet. What you want is a nice male about 10 years older than you who has been divorced for about two years now. There are plenty of them about and you should be able to pick one up very easily. Run through approximately two of them, maybe three, and then go back to the men your own age for your husband-material.


> duh477: dating 2 girls
I have casually been dating 2 girls for a few weeks and I would like to have a relationship with one of them how do I tell the other girl that ive decided to become a couple with the other girl?

A few weeks? That's all?!?!?! Aren't you rushing things a bit??

Buddy, the best way to go here is for you to chill and let the ladies choose you, or not, as they will. Give it two years before you decide on this "being a couple" thing.

Because it takes that long for something this important.

STOP RUSHING IT and KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.


> duh477: will this be a problem
I have been going out with one girl and recently had sex with her for the first time and soon I would like to ask her for a blow job the only problem is I dont want to return the favor.

To ask to receive when you will not give is being UNFAIR & SELFISH and you MUST talk with her about this BEFORE you ask for fellatio. That way, she can decide whether or not to keep you as her lover or to trade you in on someone else.

If it were me, I'd kick you to the curb. I do NOT tolerate selfishness in my lovers.


> ClulessAce: Oral Sex

I've been with my bf for a year and he brought oral sex, but I avoided it. He's knows I've been sexual abused but we havent' went into detail.

{I]Please understand that the abuse is NOT your fault and that sex is NOT the problem. When someone hits you with a hammer, you do not blame the hammer and refuse to use it, right? Same thing here with sex. Get counseling for the abuse (may your abuser rot in hell btw) it will help you to stop making your abuser's problem your problem. His/her flaw doesn't have to be yours as well.

I say this because you're making this man here pay for something some other person did to you and that is being unfair.[/I]


> Dylan79: How do I get my wife more wet. I would like a female viewpoint

Ahem..are you listening?

You're NOT thrilling her, buddy, therefore she's not getting wet.

First thing is to read my two articles. Next thing is to get the right attitude which is a combination of masculine heat tempered with a respect for the feminine. You must understand that if unleashed, her desires can completely overwhelm you.

The trick is to unleash her desires. You cannot DEMAND this, you can only INVITE her.

So while you are moving through the steps outlined in The Program esp during the body worship murmur gently how desirable she is, how absolutely wonderful you find her, and yet, do NOT let her reach orgasm. What you want her to do is to get so frustrated that she attacks you.

Poke the tigress with a stick in the hope of getting her to pounce upon you.

Afterwards, scoop her up into your big strong arms say WOW! and swing her around whilst laughing - CELEBRATE! REJOICE!

and then tell her she needs never hide from you again, you can take all she cares to give you.
Got it?


> Is the cart before the horse?

Hang on, hang on - have you quite mastered sex or are you two just leaping to kink prematurely? I have known it to happen which is why I ask. Sex ONLY becomes boring when one isn't terribly good at it. Then people bring in lingerie, role-play, kink, etc. in a vain effort to rekindle what needs more than rekindling.

Please find and read the two sticky posts entitled The Program and Body Worship. Follow them.

Superb sex is a practice of nuance and subtlety with each person delighting their partner(s). If you pay attention - there is absolutely no way sex could be boring because it is different each and every time even with the same partner(s) as the dynamics between you change over time.

If you aren't exciting her to the point where even the slightest breath of wind against her skin is enough to give her an orgasm, you're not doing it well enough. If her lightly removing lint from your suitcoat sleeve doesn't make you groan with remembered pleasure and anticipatory delight, then you're both not doing it well enough.

Explore what you have and master your skills before moving onward.