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It should be a two way thing. You should both be able to tell the other what you would like. using phrases like " you are not doing it right" or "you are doing it wrong" certainly are not conducive to an atmosphere or a relationship that will lead to sexual satisfaction.
The way to start is to have a nice friendly talk, or several talks, with him about what you both like, might like, are dying to try, don't like, aren't keen on but would be willing to do to please the other etc. Also get at least one and maybe several of the many excellent how to sex books that are out there.
Your situation is not that grave, yet. But, why wait until it degenerates.
If he likes to see you touch yourself you should do it for him. Many couples enjoy masturbating simultaneously for each other. I have had races with partners to see who could climax first from masturbation. I don't know why you women think you could ever beat one of us guys at that LOL.
Back to the touching thing. Something that is VERY important and practically all couples therapists recommend is that you spend a lot of time learning to touch each other, before sex, during sex, after sex and when you are not having sex.
I only wish you the very best. Talk with him.
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