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I agree 100% w/doc. You have to realize what impact any action will have on your wife and family....and do the right thing. The worse thing a spouse could do to me was risk my health for adventure or to scratch an itch...if I only had been given an option. Seriously, while in the current situation, your feelings are insignificant until you either leave or tell her first--let her make an informed choice.
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No one can ruin your day without your permission.
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