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What works for my wife is us in the "69" position while laying on our sides. I start by using my toungue and teasing her labia and clit. I take a nice slow pace. When she gets more excited, I put some water based lube on my fingers and verrrrry slowly tease the outside of her vagina with four fingers held together. As I continue to lick her, I am doing some dirty talk and tell her I want to open her up real wide. This really gets her going, but I continue to tease her for awhile longer. When I know she is getting close, I insert all four fingers into her with a gentle but persistant pressure. I end up with all four fingers in her past the second knuckle. This is wide enough to give her a mind blowing orgasm. The intensity of her contractions is unbelievable. The timing of the clit licking and fingering is important though. If I just penetrate her without licking her clit, it is uncomfortable for her. The trick I found is the timing of insering my fingers. I watch her body language. If I do it just right, I can stop licking her clit and finish her off using deep and wide (the wide or stretching part is key) penetration of my four fingers. Of course, we have been married for 10 years now and i know the "combination to my wife's orgasm safe" well. Practice makes perfect, and what a wonderful time we have experimenting! I have found that taking the focus off of myself, and wanting to please my wife has produced wonderful benefits. Communication and trust is the key!
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