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I recommend that the two of you read each of the articles, discuss them, and add the information to what each of you already knows. As for things to do beyond oral stimulation, that is "it" in a lot of situations because orgasms from Foreplay are generally much more intense than Intercourse. For more on this please read the article about the Kivin Method.

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

Try stopping and doing something OTHER than sex. Take the lady at her word. Show her that you are more than just another 'walking penis'. Think of what she likes, non-sexually speaking, and go do it even if that means walking around an art gallery looking at incomprehensible art.

[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;272665]Try stopping and doing something OTHER than sex. Take the lady at her word. Show her that you are more than just another 'walking penis'. Think of what she likes, non-sexually speaking, and go do it even if that means walking around an art gallery looking at incomprehensible art.[/QUOTE]

Quoted for truth. This is sound advice whether it's 10 months or 13 years (made it there yesterday :)).

The times I've pushed my wife the farthest away are the times I've tried hardest to pull her near. Just like the buddy that always only talks about fishing, and you know what he's going to say before he says it, don't be the boyfriend that makes her mind play "here he goes, talking fucking again".

Things that work for me are in the category of being "in charge". If she typically lines out dates then you line some out. But especially DON'T do obvious sexy things, like always the scantily clad clubs, or always candle lit dinners. Those are easy to see through.

The art gallery is a fantastic example. Others are plays, shopping expressly for her, or depending on location even something like the horse track. (Obviously vary these on your age, I couldn't tell if this was an adult or young.) The main thing though is be confident and have fun. Don't look like you're faking it, even though you may be. I've lost a lot of ground by blowing my cover shopping. :)

Shopping is too fraught with danger for an inexperienced male to attempt.
I do not recommend a man attempt to shop with a woman without having done so with his mother during his childhood.

For those men without this experience, begin with grocery-shopping - just push the cart, heft the heavy items, and don't have an opinion. (Ask any married man about his having an opinion.) From there, move on to running errands. Arrange transport, carry everything you possibly can, and don't have an opinion.

Men who have shopped with their mothers before can take on the role of forager. That is they go ahead and gather up the specified items and bring them back to her while she's concluding the acquisition of another item. This has the advantage of decreasing the time spent in this activity. Deviating in any way when securing the specified items results in heavy blows to your head so don't deviate.

Males should always bear in mind that from earliest childhood women have been trained to shop. Even now, I am training my 4 and 5 yr old granddaughters how to forage, since they have already passed their preliminary "hand me that" and "get me two of those" training. We have also begun training on fruits and vegetables - the proper selecting thereof.

Do NOT attempt to shop for clothing with a woman unless it is for your clothes. She has been taught 'outfits' since she was 3. You haven't. Save yourselves and just stick to car parts.

Shush EEK! It's my only entertainment at the shops watching clothing-ignorant males. It's a hard earned right now that I've passed the women's clothing gauntlet! :)

For any males here that find themselves being pulled into a clothing situation, here's a tip. Just watch your lady, and mimmic. Use the same adjectives she's using. Know "why" your shopping (ie. workout clothes, job clothes, going out clothes) and adjust accordingly. Don't talk. Don't suggest. Especially don't be bored. There are almost always girls to look at deeper in the store, so just scan around if you need a break. Also, carry everything. She can't look at clothes with a bag in her hand, so if you want it over faster be her pit crew.

Lastly (and I don't know why this works) walk around and rub the materials between your fingers, like testing how smooth they are. But don't LOOK at the clothes when doing it. Just wander away from her through racks touching random things. This works 3 fold; you look interested, she thinks your helping "cover ground", and you're not just hovering by the door pining for the Gamestop across the hall. It's much easier to wander around an "not find anything" than to ever dare FINDING something.

Now as for opinions. Opinions are for dumbasses. The lonely men in the center isle benches were full of opinions once, but now they can't come with to Victoria Secret. They don't get to see hot women holding hot panties up to their hot bodies. They have to stare at horse calendars at a kiosk for 40 minutes. If you're asked your opinion, you are with a malicious woman. Do both of you a favor duck out to the arcade. ;)

LOL@Firmus You forgot one item: Don't get CAUGHT looking at other women because if she does - good or bad - you're in for an interrogation. Or does this 'go without saying'?

[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;272720]LOL@Firmus You forgot one item: Don't get CAUGHT looking at other women because if she does - good or bad - you're in for an interrogation. Or does this 'go without saying'?[/QUOTE]

Quite without saying for the average couple. :)

That's why you look deeper in the store. You have to do a sweeping scan with your whole head, not eyes. Eyes stay fixed in your head and you NEVER STOP at anything. Think lawn sprinkler. If your eyes focus then she can trace the beams, and you're toast. Just as you girls mastered the art of outfits, boys master the art of deceptive staring. Like looking in a shop window for the sake of the reflection of the girl behind him. Geez I'm breaking the man code here, giving away all the secrets!

I'm extremely lucky though as we tell each other "holy shit look at that dude/girl!" without any repercussions. I've never understood the looking jealousy. Just so long as we don't be a jerk and stare.

MY husband has the perfect retort - "She'd be good for our son.".

Sorry, I have to speak up on the shopping thing. All is not lost, especially since it's almost September.

Go Christmas shopping together. When not Christmas season, you could try birthday shopping for someone in your collective life.

T and I had our first real date in October, and early that December we went Christmas shopping together. It was an awesome way to get to know each other better, have some fun, and because she's not shopping for herself, there's actual permission to have opinions :p Plus, it gives you the opportunity to notice things she sees or mentions that she likes herself(because you're paying attention, RIGHT?). You file that away and go back later and magically, your Christmas shopping for HER is done too.

And, in the interest of giving men (or at least mine) a little credit, that shopping date was HIS idea. He'd read somewhere that it's a great way to get to know each other. And, I do have to say, he has a history of having a good eye for tops that will look great on me. I truly believe part of that, is that he's in golf retail, and sells clothes and hats as a part of his merchandise.

the shopping thing can be fun if done creatively

Years ago when I was still dating my wife, we'd go to one of the mega malls and split up, we each were to buy something for ourself that was under $10 and something for the other person that was under $15 ....... It was always fun and you knew you were going home with 2 new things (you may have to adjust the prices now for inflation

Also if you want to go dancing, don't go to a nightclub, but go to a country western bar, where you can dance close and people are covered up a bit more. It's sexual in a less obvious way

As for dinner, try a new restaurant, it doesn't have to be a fancy 5 star place, in fact you can have fun trying out the new bbq dive across town. it's about being together

> Also if you want to go dancing, don't go to a nightclub, but go to a country western bar, where you can dance close and people are covered up a bit more. It's sexual in a less obvious way

Having just returned from the greater Dallas area, I can tell you that Ballroom dancing is alive and well, also. No bars--just dance halls.

Look around your area for either type and give it/them a try.