talking dirty basics

Dirty Talk - Basics

You are laying beside your partner, feeling their naked skin caress yours. Their chest rises with every whisper of a breath. You can feel their warm lips against your neck, and all of sudden, the sexually enticing words rush through your body like a jolt of energy. Have you wanted to unleash that wild side of yours through dirty talking, but haven’t found the courage, or don’t even know where to start? Here we have gathered techniques to teach beginners exactly how to do so. There are tips for breathing, body movements, sounds and the actual phrases themselves. The most important thing about talking dirty is how you say it, rather than what you say!

Creating Mood

For some, the first attempt at talking dirty with a partner can seem to be quite awkward. To eliminate some of that initial embarrassment, you should mention both the idea of the experiment to your partner as well as the limit of your desired kinkiness. The latter is created to help avoid a negative reaction from your partner in case you go "buck-wild" too quickly and cross their own personal boundaries. However, this chat should not occur directly before the incident; this could create massive unwanted pressure. Let’s face it – most people do not want be in the bright spot light when beginning to speak dirty.

Creating a sensual mood is an essential basic to letting that naughty side out of you. No, no - - put that Barry White CD down! The aura I have in mind could be considered a little peculiar, for it consists of a rhythm of breaths and body movements, rather than the soft music and candles, as most would expect. Yet you can also use those if you feel it adds to turning you on. This aspect is the most important part of dirty talking, because it is not what you say, but how you say it. You could say the dirtiest thing in the world and yet sound as sexy as an electronic encyclopedia.


Stabilizing your breathing is quite significant for it distinguishes the difference between speaking normally, and talking dirty. You should begin by imitating the deep breaths you take in the doctor’s office as he/she listens to your lungs. You have the option of breathing through your nose, mouth or both. If decide to breathe through your mouth, you do not want to form a large “o” shape with your lips. Come on, you are not a pet waiting for a treat from its owner. Instead your mouth should be slightly open, no bigger than the point of your index finger. This seems to produce a more appealing expression...

The speed of the breaths should co-ordinate with the progression occurring from body movements, foreplay or intercourse. If you are about to make sensual love, then the breaths should be slow, and if you are about to imitate a wild rabbit gone mad, then the breaths would obviously be faster.

After accomplishing a stable beat, you should be examining the sound of your respiration. Most importantly, your exhaling should faintly die off. If the exhale breath stays one tone, it could seem abrupt and almost forced. To help you visualize the sound of this breathing technique, picture a roller coaster. As it shimmies up the tracks, you inhale. As it pauses for a mere half a second at the top, so do you. Then as it coasts down the tracks until slowing down for the next hill, you make the initial part of the exhaling breath a little loud and then slowly become quiet. You may want to consider practicing this routine when you are by yourself.

Adding Sounds

Once you feel comfortable with this breathing technique, you can begin to make sounds as you exhale. These sounds should usually be instinctive and relaxed such as "uh," "ah," "oh," or "mmm." Here you are able to comfortably drop your jaw to widen your mouth if wanted. Do not analyze these sounds; there is no need to worry whether you are making a correct sound. If you unsure, a good rule is that you can rarely go wrong with vowels rather than some awkward consonant. For example, perhaps you choose the sound "bah;" you will ultimately sound like one very naughty, moaning sheep.

The trick with these sounds is that you are not being loud; actually you are being quite faint. The desired outcome is for your voice to barely seep out. Technically, this is speech sound articulated by a momentary closing of the glottis in the back of your throat, hence restricting the airflow. In laymen terms, you are making a murmur sound or a loud whisper. This is also commonly known as a “sexy voice.” If you are having difficulty reaching this volume, imagine being backstage at a play. All of a sudden, the main character draws a blank and completely forgets all his lines. It is entirely up to you to whisper the lines loud enough for the actor to hear, but not loud enough for the audience to hear.

Adding Body Movements

To perfect the rhythm, you now want to add body movements. Desirably, the body movements should be in perfect harmony with your respiration; the body movement should begin and end when a breath begins and ends. As you inhale, your chest should ever so slightly rise in an upward and diagonally out motion. Naturally, your shoulders will delicately move backwards and your upper back should arch with this motion.

There are many different techniques for exhaling. You can simply let your chest, shoulders, and upper back return to their original positions. This can resemble a relieving motion. Another option is to add a subtle pelvic thrust. As you inhale, let your lower back arch so your pelvis and buttocks are being pushed outwards. Your abdominal muscles are being elongated. As you exhale, squeeze your buttocks and bring your pelvis forward in a scooping motion, from a side angle, until back to its original position.

To add some difficulty to these movements, try adding an abdominal contraction as you are about to make the scooping motion. A contraction is the tensing of muscles. An abdominal contraction resembles the same motion your abs make if they are about to be unexpectedly punched; your shoulders move a little forward as the abs are pushed against your back. Ultimately, the contraction should make your pelvis finish the scooping motion by delicately going upwards and back down to its original state. From a side view, the path of your pelvis should resemble the digit, "six."

For those looking for even more difficulty, let the quiver of the contraction be heard in the exhale breath. This sound can be quite sexual, for you can tie it to dirty talking concerning ejaculation. Even though all these movements are critical, you do not want to overdo the actions. You aren’t trying to get the attention of a plane. Keep it subtle or you’ll be doomed to the funky chicken dance.

You can also add other smaller body movements to the rhythm such as the arching of your neck, the closing of your eyes, and the clenching of your hand or the biting of your bottom lip.

Further Reading

Now that you have a firm grasp of the basics, you are ready for the next lesson - our Dirty Talk Advanced Guide!

I would love to do this with

I would love to do this with my Boyfriend, but I'm just too shy to speak up at all in the middle of our Love Making. Any ideas on how I can fix that?

How can I talk dirty?

My whole life I've been taught to be completely respectful to women I'm 15 and I need to know how can I stay with my habit but still get a girl " in the mood"?

Hey just because you were


just because you were raised to treat wemen with respect doesn't mean you have to when you are trying to get her in the mood. I am a freshmen in high school and my boyfriend is a senior and he was raised to always treat women with respect but when he trys getting me in the mood he doesn't worry about respecting me because he knows that he is goIng to get something good out of it. But he is STILL RESPECTFUL ENOUGH to know when he ia pushing it. He knows not to get me pissed because he knows he will get in trouble. So forget about respecting her when you are trying to get her in the mood but also keep in mind if she is liking what you are saying to her.


message me anytime you have questions

I think as long as you don't

I think as long as you don't repeat the dirty talk outside of the bedroom (or where ever), and make sure she's comfortable with what you're saying, it'll all be well.

I Want To Turn Him On

I'm in s long distince relationship and my bf loves to talk dirty and turn me on. Which I love also but I want to start talking dirty out of the blue to him and turn him on like he alwasy does to me. But I don't know how to get started when the time comes so could you plz message me and help me out!! Thank You!!

Well how far is he away from

Well how far is he away from you? And if he starts talking dirty to you first just think about what he says and come but with something from what he says or start saying "kisses you deeply with tongue" and s**t like that.

Dirty Talk As Part Of Lifestyle

Having been with partners who had no desire to talk dirty, in or out of bed, either in response to me or to generate a response from me, I am finally in a relationship in which we can & do share our desires constantly. Having passed 50 a couple years ago, this relationship of over a year has lost none of it's fire and passion experienced since the beginning. Much of the pleasure enjoyed by both of us begins with our openly expressing our desires & needs to one another. I tell her how I want to feel her hot pussy,taste her juices on my fingers, smell her scent, and she tells me how she wants to run her tongue all over my balls & cock, then take me full inside her mouth. When actually engaged in sex, we continue to exhort each other, with me telling her how warm & wet her cunt feels, and she tells me to bang her hard. Dirty talk primes us for only touching or tasting, as well as full on sex anywhere at any time. I've never felt the level of sexual satisfaction that I now have until finding this partner who shares my desires, and is quite vocal about them.

My favorite: She says "Hot

My favorite: She says "Hot rod, you've got the biggest, most powerful stick of dynamite on God's earth, and i cant wait for you to detonate and have an almighty explosion deep inside of me and fill me up and blow my brains out with ecstasy!" That's gotta make any man wanna give his ALL! WOW!- I GET SO HARD-ON JUST ANTICIPATING IT!!!

I just usually moan ;)

I just usually moan ;)

that's the best thing to do

that's the best thing to do lol

my boyfriend is in prison

my boyfriend is in prison and always wants to talk dirty and have phone sex but i just shy up1 what should i do? how should i warm up?

as far as communication

as far as communication goes, me and my man are kindof backwards. hes really talketive and im very quiet. this followes through to when we are in bed too. he likes to talk dirty and he loves it when i do say something back but i can rarely think of anything. however i do get quite loud when he makes me cum. could this be frustrating him or am i overanalyzing

dirty talk

dirty talk from the right man have me cumming all over the dick..... that why i luv my man he has me soaking wet

i want to try this and so

i want to try this and so does my man but i think it will just be really awkward... so anyone have any ideas to help us out and make it go better?

Start simple and kinda make

Start simple and kinda make a "date" of it so you're looking forward to it! It makes things easyer if you're already a bit turned on when you guys make the call bec it'll help set the mood and you wont be focusing on how you 'think it'll be awkward' bec obviously you want to experiment with this idea.

As to what to say; it totally depends on you
If you're not too talkative in bed (like my man) then just start with imagining what you like when your partner does touch you, and tell him /her about it. what it is that turns you on....anything from.

"the thought of that ______look you gave me when _____ ____ ___ made me feel____ __ ______"
"As you ________my ______ and it makes me ______ i cant _______ and i want to ______"
If that seems to help at all.
I'm also a fan of roll playing it lets you focus on more the experience of insted of analizing.

p.s. have a safe word (for if you're uncomfortable, need to pause or if someone comes home is a good idea without hurting any feelings)

Dirty Talk

I always tell my wife that my cock feels good in her hot wet pussy. Or i say things like damn your pussy is wet, you like my cock in you, i wanna eat that pussy. I can tell it turns her on but she never says anything back


Me and my girl can talk and talk about sex and me fucking her and eating her but when we both want it bad we can never do anything to get it. What im trying to say is that we are all talk and no action. The most I've got so far is her to tickle my clit and we have alot of phone sex but we never get to the sex it's self... Can anyone help me with an idea to help me actully to have sex... I mean we both want to but we just never do... It's so frustrating... HELP!!!


When its comes to being sexual with my bf I'm not at all shy but he told me lately he wanted me to talk dirty to him cuz it turns him on more. But I feel all odd about it and I'm not sure why. I love when he talks dirty to me and I'm feeling that I'm being selfish by not talking dirty back to him like he wants me to. Any advice?

Well I am still a virgin but

Well I am still a virgin but I can still help you. When I was going out with a senior he would talk dirty to me all the rime and it would make me as horny as a mother f*** ker and he wanted me to to it back to him, I felt uncomfortable talking dirty to him so o told him that I wasn't comfortable doing that and I just needed time to get use to talking dirty. He helped me get over that and now I can talk dirty to my current boyfriend. So just talk to him about it and see if he can help you over come that fear and maybe he can. But if you ever need help then just message me and I will hel you


So maybe you're not

So maybe you're not comfortable speaking out about what turns you on or how you want him.

Thats prob all he wants to hear, yes its that easy.

try sending him a lil text or two to see how it feels(obviously when he is around or when you know he's not at dinner with his mother or something)

You may be surprised by his sure he realises that you need a bit of a confidence boost and if you find its not something you enjoy doing then let him know bec it shouldnt be a problem


once i talked dirty during sex. i liked it, but my man didnt. it's a real gutter getting rejected talking dirty when you're nervous about it in the first place. i think i did okay.
first, i whispered "fuck me" in his ear. then i lay naked on the bed, my legs slightly open, him above me, saying "c'mon baby, fuck me. i want your big dick inside of me me. i'm so wet. please baby."

isnt that what men want?!

It depends on the type of

It depends on the type of man he is. I am only 15. But I have had a few boyfriends get mad at me of talking dirty and I was alittle upset. I am still a virgin but I have talked dirty to slot of guys and trust me some of them like duty talk and some don't. It just depends. And if he doesnt like it don't push it that just gets them pissed tursy me again on that one.I hope I helped.


Ranges from guy to guy and

Ranges from guy to guy and also time and place. It also depends on what kind of sex you want. If I want intimate sex with my gf, I wouldn't want her to say what you said, but she's been out of town for 3 weeks so right now I'd die for the sex that'd follow what you said.

Can't speak for all guys here, but I believe there is a difference between when a girl wants "sex" and when a girl wants to be "fucked."

Sex can range from slow and intimate to rough and mind blowing, but if my gf wants to be "fucked," then I hold my breath and prepare for a workout because she wants rough sex and I am expected to perform. Also, when a girl wants to be "fucked" it usually follows that the guy does most if not all of the work. You have to be careful though because if your partner isn't confident in his ability, what you said may stress him out because he's now more concerned about his performance than having fun.

A good way to get him ready to hear this and mentally prepare himself (if he isn't already??????) is to talk dirty in whispers in public when sex isn't possible at that moment. Great way to see how he responds. If he likes it, he'll let you know.

Me and my bf were messing

Me and my bf were messing around but he didn't want to have sex because he didn't want to take my virgintity... We would mess around and he would scratch my back a little hard, and whisper in my ear, "I wanna fuck you soooo bad..." This would get me more aroused... It is depending on the guy... just talk to him and see wat he wants... the other nite we were txtin and i said the things i would do to you... he said what... (he thought i was gonna say have sex with him) but i ended up going into this whole entire story about every little thing i would do to him (take my tongue and lick it up his dick then put my mouth around it and stuck it in my mouth as I sucked harder and faster)... it killed him... like he was wanting me to come up soooo bad after that... wait til u can't do nething bc it makes it soooo much better wen you do because both of you are so horny and you want it so bad that it just turns out mind blowing!!!


i'm a female, wat can i say to my partner to get him arroused?


Use your partners name while moaning its a major turn on and it reminds him that you are focused on whatever HE is doing. also telling him what you like is good too: If hes eating you and you like something tell him to do it again.

word i need to say

hey yall im not sure what to say when i have sex the people just say hush baby just moan like im saying it wrong or something so i was just wodering what should i say i mean like what

i talk dirty (or so i'd been

i talk dirty (or so i'd been told) during sex, but i was never relly sure if it was true, so my when my boyfriend and i recorded ourselves having sex, i could hear every word i uttered throughout. i must say...i was better off not knowing! :P


i grab my bfs head and hold his ear to my mouth and moan and whisper his name into his ear he goes crazzzyy

winner. using our names

winner. using our names drives us nuts. makes things more passionate.

dirty talk

im as naughty as a female gets, wanting sex every day, walking around nude, and smoking like crazy. Me and my boyfriend just keep talking dirty every time we have sex.