How do I get my virgin boyfriend ready?

Q. I'm an experienced girl who's dating a virgin. We've been talking about sex a lot, and he wants to have it. I know his first time won't be amazing, but it will get better. What's something I can do to still turn him on without making him cum too soon?


A. It is not uncommon for men to experience {premature ejaculation} from time to time, and first time sex is no exception. The long period of abstinence, the intense anticipation, and the excitement from actually doing it can overload a guy so much, it's no wonder first timers often suffer from things such as Premature Ejaculation or temporary Impotence, and seeing as you know this already, you've started preparing yourself for a quick curtain call the first time around.

It's great that you have realistic expectations about his premiere sex performance, but don't write him off either. Sure he's green, but he could just as easily surprise you. Instead of expecting his first time being a disappointment for the both of you, work together on ways to help him keep his jets humming, not sputtering. Both of you could benefit from learning about delaying ejaculation from our article on Lasting Longer. Also, check out our editorial on 5 Tips To A Better First Time; you'll both learn very useful techniques to help him 'squeeze out' every last moment of sex and you'll pick up strategies to help him pace himself. It's advisable for him to get some practice under his belt before going all the way, which can be done simply by employing them while Masturbating or playing around (Foreplay) with you.

There's been no talk about the impact that this sexual partner is going to have on you. Just because you've had more sexual encounters than him doesn't make you the guru on all matters sex. You'll have different relationships with every person you're intimate with, plus they'll have their own unique sexual style; so naturally, the way sex is going to feel for you will vary from partner to partner. With that said, take time to prepare yourself emotionally for having sex with him and set yourself up for satisfying sex too.

Just one more thing... you're going to hold a special place in your boyfriend's life by being His First Time. As already mentioned, there are so many emotions associated with losing one's virginity, and for some people it's a really big deal. Don't focus so much on whether or not your man cums too quickly; rather, regard it as the very special experience it truly is: the one that he chose to share with you.